Toy Chest Theater: Spider-Man Fails?

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

This image makes me think of the art we saw in the aftermath of 9/11. Images of the superheroes we love, placed next to the very real heroes who rushed in to save lives and provide aid when the terrorist attacks occurred. John Romita Jr’s work in The Amazing Spider-Man #36 comes to mind, for obvious reasons.

The caption on photographer Joe Hume’s Instagram page reads “Sometimes we fail.” That’s interesting, as that’s not how I read this image. Mourning? Yes. Failure? No. But that seems to be the story Hume had in mind. Fair enough, I suppose.

Either way, it’s a powerful image. The iconography of the Spider-Man suit and the fireman’s hat. The orange blaze in the background. But the lighting from below is what clinches it. I don’t know that it’s supposed to be from the fire. A street light, perhaps. Or a light on one of the buildings. But it works very well.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter, or email Rob at primaryignition@yahoo.com.

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Rian Johnson on The Last Jedi: Luke’s Exile

***Lots of people have lots of opinions about Star Wars: The Last Jedi. You have one. I have one. But you know whose opinion I want to hear? Rian Johnson’s. He wrote it. He directed it. Now let’s hear what he has to say about it. That’s what this space is for. This is “Rian Johnson on The Last Jedi.“***

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

The Scene: Picking right up from the ending of The Force Awakens, Rey has arrived on the planet Ahch-To to seek out Luke Skywalker. She brings him his father’s lightsaber, the same one he lost on Bespin decades ago. Luke tosses the weapon over the cliff, refusing to help Rey.

Rian Johnson Says (Via The Last Jedi Commentary Track): “This moment of Mark [Hamill] tossing the saber, that was always just something that made a lot of sense to me … The first thing I had to do as I was writing the script was figure out, why was Luke on this island? … So he knows his friends are fighting this good fight, he knows there’s peril out there in the galaxy, and he’s exiled himself way out here and taken himself out of it. So I had to figure out why. And I knew because it was Luke Skywalker, who I grew up with as a hero, I knew the answer couldn’t be cowardice. So I knew the answer had to be something active, he couldn’t just be hiding. It had to be something positive. He thinks he’s doing the right thing.

“And that kind of led to…the notion that he’s come to the conclusion from all the given evidence that the Jedi are not helping. They’re just perpetuating this kind of cycle. They need to go away so that the light can rise from a more worthy source. So suddenly that turned his exile from something where he’s hiding and avoiding responsibility to him kind of taking the weight of the world on his shoulders and bearing this huge burden of know his friends are suffering. And because he thinks its the bigger and better thing for the galaxy, he’s choosing to not engage with it.”

I Say: The notion that they handed this series off to Johnson without a plan, or answers to certain questions, is flabbergasting to me. Supposedly, that is indeed what happened. He sat down and wrote this movie with no idea why Luke had exiled himself, who Rey’s family was, who Snoke was, or any of that. He had to create his own answers. So I can sympathize with the position he was apparently put in.

The reason he came up with for Luke’s exile was fine. I like it a lot, in fact. I can certainly appreciate that it wasn’t simply cowardice. What I, and certainly numerous others, did not appreciate was the comedic chucking of the lightsaber over the cliff. That moment between Luke and Rey at the end of The Force Awakens had so much weight to it. It was the first time we’d seen Luke since Return of the Jedi. He was shocked to see this new person who’d discovered him, and Rey was vulnerable, silently asking for his guidance. It was a cliffhanger suitable to end the movie, and one we waited two damn years to get the payoff for…

It’s not Luke’s rejection of the weapon, and thus Rey’s question, that irks me. It’s the tonality of it. Instead of having Luke toss it, why not just let it drop to his feet? It’s less heavy-handed (no pun intended), and subtly speaks to his refusal to take on the responsibility of being a hero. Instead, he just tosses the weapon away like a discarded soda can or something. To do it the way they did was almost disrespectful to The Force Awakens

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter, or email Rob at primaryignition@yahoo.com.

Spider-Man: Far From Home Trailer Ponderings…

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

So the Spider-Man: Far From Home trailer hit the web today.

HA! Hit the web. See what I did?

Anyway, here are some thoughts. Because that’s what we internet fanboys do. We give thoughts on things, whether you want them or not…

– Given all the hype Into the Spider-Verse has gotten recently, including the Golden Globe Award for Best Animated Feature, it’s a little weird to already be talking about another Spider-Man flick. Incidentally, I’m ashamed to say I haven’t seen Into the Spider-Verse yet. Especially because it’s probably going to end up being a better movie than this one.

– I’ll give the Marvel folks credit, though. They’re doing things that haven’t been done in these Spidey movies before. It would have been really easy to just drop him in New York again. But the whole field trip story is a nice twist on things. Hey, wait a minute…this was also the story for The Lizzy McGuire Movie!!!

– I confess, when Jake Gyllenhaal first appeared in the Mysterio costume, I thought he’d been displaced from a Thor movie. He looks good enough, I suppose. He’d better, as Mysterio is one of the last big Spider-Man villains they haven’t brought to the big screen yet. I mean, who do we have left? Kraven the Hunter? Carnage, but they obviously want him in the next Venom movie. So who does that leave? Hobgoblin? Meh…

– The inclusion of Nick Fury in this movie reminds me of a scene in the old Bendis/Bagley Ultimate Spider-Man comic. Fury implies that when Peter turns 18, he’ll be working for S.H.I.E.L.D. whether he wants to or not. It’s a great little moment that they paid off several issues later. It’d be interesting if we got a little something like that here.

– Tom Holland is a damn good Spider-Man. Probably the best one yet. From me, that’s really saying something, as I loved Tobey Maguire in that role. Incidentally, now that Into the Spider-Verse has become a hit, what are the odds of bringing Tobey back into the franchise in some form? As like an alt-universe Spidey? Hell, bring Andrew Garfield back too, if it makes sense. But mainly, I want Tobey back.

– Full disclosure: I know next to nothing about Zendaya. I saw her in Homecoming, and I saw her in The Greatest Showman. That’s it. But I really like her as Mary Jane. It feels like a fresher take on the character. Plus, she and Holland have good chemistry.

– So Marisa Tomei is apparently doing the will they/won’t they dance with the Jon Favreau character. That’s the spot formerly occupied by Tony Stark. Hate to say it kids, but might mean Tony is bitin’ the big one in Endgame. Get your tissues ready.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter, or email Rob at primaryignition@yahoo.com.

Strowman is Out, Balor is In, Plus Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

Yeah, I had fun last week, so I’m back this week. Not a bad night for it either, as the Royal Rumble got a hell of a shake-up….

Braun Strowman opens the show, and announces he’s “all healed up.” Baron Corbin interrupts to taunt him. Strowman chases Corbin backstage, ripping apart Vince McMahon’s limo in the process. As punishment, McMahon cancels Strowman’s Universal Title Match at the Royal Rumble. When Vince and Braun had their scene next to the wrecked limo, I was literally saying out loud: “Braun, please don’t back down from the 73-year-old man who’s half your size.” Thankfully, he didn’t…much.

I’m wondering how much of this had to do with that horrible segment Braun and Brock had last week. Another Brock vs. Braun match wasn’t exactly red hot. But that segment practically put it on ice. IF there’s a silver lining here, it’s that Braun won’t have to lose to Brock again. At least not yet. Plus, it made this show that much more interesting.

Perhaps fittingly, Braun had yet another verbal flub here. He referenced “WWE World Cup” instead of WWE Crown Jewel. Although given all the nasty press that show got, maybe they actually scripted him that way.

Ronda Rousey and Sasha Banks def. Nia Jax and Tamina. Rousey and Banks get into a verbal spat after the match. After last week, I couldn’t help but be nervous when Sasha went up for that ‘rana on Nia early on. That image of Sasha going splat on the floor is going to stay with me awhile.

They did pretty well with the post-match verbage. Sasha managed not to come off like an obnoxious brat, which is always a plus. Expectations are high for them once we get to Phoenix.

The Revival def. Lucha House Party. I had flashbacks of “Lucha House Rules” Matches when the Revival’s music hit. Frankly, I didn’t ever need to see these two teams wrestle again. But at least this time, the right team won. And at least Dash and Dawson have a story nowadays.

John Cena, Drew McIntyre, Baron Corbin, and Finn Balor all pitch themselves as Brock’s new opponent at the Rumble. Vince McMahon makes a Fatal Four-Way Match later in the show to decide the new top contender. We got some pretty good mic work here. Cena played his veteran role to perfection, transitioning into McIntyre’s angry stuff. The stuff between Vince and Balor was interesting. They played right into the whole “Vince loves big guys” stereotype. Not bad at all.

Nikki Cross makes her Raw wrestling debut, teaming with Bayley, and Natalya to defeat The Riott Squad. So they’re letting this new crop of call-ups wrestle on both shows until they decide where to put them? That just tells me they still haven’t decided what to do with them yet. Some of them, at least. That’s somewhat understandable, given how abruptly they were apparently summoned. But they announced this a month ago. You’d think they’d have figured it out by now.

All that said, Nikki had a good outing here. Kudos to Ruby Riott for selling her ass off for her. And on a related note…

EC3, Lacey Evans, and Heavy Machinery have cameos during the broadcast. EC3 and Lacey both wrestled dark matches before Raw last week. At least this week they made TV.

I’m sure EC3 will be fine on the main roster. Though hopefully they don’t do what they did with Bobby Roode, and bring him in as a babyface when he’s such a natural heel. Heavy Machinery should do well too, so long as they don’t make Otis a comedy act. As for Lacey Evans, I’m curious to see how her persona plays on a national level. It could go either way.

Finn Balor def. Jinder Mahal to retain his spot in the Fatal Four-Way Match later in the night. When they made this match, the story for the four-way became pretty obvious. But it’s a good story, so I can’t fault them for it.

I can’t imagine what it feels like to take that double stomp off the top rope. Balor stuck that landing right in Jinder’s stomach. Ouch.

Bobby Lashley def. Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins in a Triple-Threat Match to win the Intercontinental Championship. Really good match. For my money, they could have had this as the main event and been perfectly fine. Great work by all four guys, Lio Rush included. And a great rub for Lashley.

I like this move. It’s got a bit of an old school WWF feel to it, with the big muscular champion and his mouthpiece. It’s a hell of an endorsement not just for Lashley, but for Rush, who literally helped turn the big man’s career around. Let’s face it: Lashley was floundering as a babyface. But they’ve slowly turned him into a commodity on that show.

On “A Moment of Bliss,” Alexa Bliss announces that at Elimination Chamber, six teams will compete to become the first WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions. Paul Heyman is interviewed. Otis Dozovic makes a bizarre interruption. They went a little Attitude Era with that guy walking in on Alexa changing. Not complaining. Just saying…

So the big news here is, of course, the Women’s Tag Team Titles. I can’t say I’m a fan of the Elimination Chamber being used to crown the champions. You’d think this would be the kind of thing they’d save for Wrestlemania. Nevertheless, here we are.

Now it’s just a question of who the six teams are. I’m going to guess Sasha Banks and Bayley, Nia Jax and Tamina, Billie Kay and Peyton Royce, the Riott Squad, Naomi and Carmella as a throw-together team, and let’s say…the Bella Twins? If they were doing this at Wrestlemania, I’d have pitched doing something with Trish Stratus and Lita. But that seems unlikely here.

Finn Balor def. John Cena, Drew McIntyre, and Baron Corbin to earn a Universal Title Match against Brock Lesnar at the Royal Rumble. Cena endorses Balor after the match. Mrs. Primary Ignition, like everyone else, was appalled by Cena’s hair. She actually called it upsetting. I mean, people used to make fun of Shawn Michaels’ bald spot. But Cena’s got him beat by a mile and a half.

I said this finish was obvious after the match with Jinder was made. But actually, it was probably when Balor and Vince had that back and forth. Either way, I’m glad we’re finally getting this match. Not that I think Balor’s going to win. If anything, I think this is confirmation that Lesnar is indeed going to Wrestlemania, where hopefully he’ll drop the title to Seth Rollins.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter, or email Rob at primaryignition@yahoo.com.

Panels of Awesomeness: Batman by Mark Bagley

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

THE ISSUE: Batman #688

CREATORS: Judd Winick (Author), Mark Bagley (Penciller), Rob Hunter (Inker), Ian Hannin (Colorist), Jared K. Fletcher (Letterer)

RELEASED: July 8, 2009. Collected in Batman: Long Shadows.

THE SCENE: Shortly after taking up the mantle of Batman, Dick Grayson trains with Damian Wayne, who has just become the new Robin.

WHY THEY’RE AWESOME: This scene has been hanging around in my subconscious for the near-decade since it was published.

On the surface, it’s not particularly remarkable. Just Dick Grayson and Damian Wayne training together. Sort of a Karate Kid scenario with Dick in the Mr. Miyagi role. But as Eric Bischoff might say, “context is king.” This issue came out shortly after Final Crisis, in which Bruce Wayne “died” at the hands of Darkseid. Thus, Dick Grayson has once again taken on the role of Batman, and Damian has become Robin.

Putting these two together was a perfect recipe for personality conflicts. Dick’s generally friendly and warm personality clashed with Damian’s defiant, abrasive, and often bratty disposition. Especially early on in their partnership.

But in Batman #688, Judd Winick took the time to balance the scales a little bit, and show us is indeed a qualified mentor for Damian. Not necessarily because of his fighting prowess, but the patience and wisdom years of experience have brought him. It’s a quality that can’t be taught, and one that makes for a damn good teacher.

I was working on a piece of fiction recently, with a scene that had a similar teacher/student premise. For whatever reason, I kept coming back to the line Dick has at the end of this scene: “Don’t anticipate.” I like that. Simple. Concise.

I know Judd Winick isn’t everybody’s favorite Batman writer. But more often than not, I really dug his stuff. Throw in the art by Mark Bagley, who’d just come off his legendary run on Ultimate Spider-Man, and these pages definitely have their fair share of awesomeness.

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Rian Johnson on The Last Jedi: “…About His Mother.”

***Lots of people have lots of opinions about Star Wars: The Last Jedi. You have one. I have one. But you know whose opinion I want to hear? Rian Johnson’s. He wrote it. He directed it. Now let’s hear what he has to say about it. That’s what this space is for. This is “Rian Johnson on The Last Jedi.“***

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

The Scene: During the film’s opening sequence, General Hux talks to Poe Dameron via comm link. Dameron makes an antagonistic allusion to Hux’s mother.

Rian Johnson Says (Via The Last Jedi Commentary Track): “I held on to this. This was something where I felt like…with the heaviness of it being the middle chapter, and I knew people were going to come in with expectations of all the grand opera of it. And I really wanted this movie to be fun. I love the tone that J.J. [Abrams], Michael [Arndt], and Larry [Kasdan] set with The Force Awakens. And the tone of the original films has a spirit of fun to it. I felt like we had to, at the very beginning, kind of break the ice and say we’re going to have fun here. We’re going to try some fun stuff, and it’s going to be okay to laugh at this movie. So we kind of start it with a little Monty Python sketch.”

I Say: He’s not wrong about the original movies having that fun spirit to them. Just a few minutes into the original movie, Threepio and Artoo comedically rush through a barrage of blaster fire. So we can’t say that humor hasn’t been part of the franchise’s DNA from the get-go. Frankly, a lot of The Last Jedi‘s jokes landed with me. Still, I wonder if given the chance to go back and chance things, Rian Johnson wouldn’t take that “…about his mother” line out.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter, or email Rob at primaryignition@yahoo.com.

Hulk Hogan’s Return, and Other Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

I couldn’t resist the chance to do a Raw write-up this week for old time’s sake. It’s the first show of the year, and the name of the game (supposedly) is shaking things up. Making Raw a fun, entertaining show again after its ratings fell to record lows during the holiday season. As the first show of the new year, this was an ideal opportunity for them to make good on that, and really give us something to remember.

Long story short, while I would consider what we got this week to be a good show, the Earth didn’t exactly move for me. We did, however, get two big returns and a touching tribute to an icon that we lost last week. So let’s take a look…

The show opens with a backstage pull-apart brawl between Seth Rollins and Bobby Lashley. John Cena returns to Raw, enters himself into the Royal Rumble Match, and then gets challenged by Drew McIntyre. A larger brawl then erupts, which turns into a Six-Man Tag. Cena, Rollins, and Finn Balor defeat McIntyre, Lashley, and Dean Ambrose. Good opener. Kick things off differently with an angle to grab their attention, then go right into Cena’s entrance to keep them. The segue into the six-man was kind of a groaner, as that’s been a staple of their lazy writing over the last decade or so. But the crowd was happy to see Cena, and the babyfaces got a nice win. So no harm done.

Hulk Hogan makes his first TV appearance for WWE in several years, paying tribute to Mean Gene Okerland. First and foremost, nothing but respect for the life and legacy of Mean Gene Okerland. His iconic voice was a huge part of many of our childhoods, and he’s forever linked with the global expansion that made the World Wrestling Federation into the juggernaut WWE is today.

WWE continues to be in an awkward position as they try to bring Hulk Hogan back into the fold. It feels fairly to say they used Okerland’s death as a chance to bring him back to TV in a relatively safe fashion. But that’s more or less what they did. They even got a bit of backlash for plugging his merchandise on Twitter.

But on the flip side, if you’re going to do a live tribute to Mean Gene, you almost have no choice but to bring in Hogan. When you think of Okerland, Hogan inevitably comes to mind. “Well let me tell you somethin’ Mean Gene,” and all that.

In the end, what they did ended up being really nice. The video package was great. And even though it seemed like much of the crowd didn’t know how to react to Hogan given the controversy, I didn’t hear any booing. So I’d say this went about as well as it could have gone.

When Hogan mentioned all those names from the golden age of WWE, it really hit home just how many of those guys left us too soon. Randy Savage. The Ultimate Warrior. Roddy Piper. Mr. Perfect. Andre the Giant. Gorilla Monsoon. Bobby Heenan. Now Mean Gene. Make no mistake about it, if you were a wrestling fan in the ’80s, those names are indelibly etched in your heart. Thank you for the memories, gentlemen.

Bobby Roode and Chad Gable def. The Revival in a Lumberjack Match to retain the Raw Tag Team Titles. I can appreciate that they didn’t just toss the tag titles on Dash and Dawson right away. Based on the screwy finish they’re going with, this is clearly going to be a drawn out thing. We may even get a Bobby Roode heel turn in the process. So I’m on board.

Baron Corbin def. Elias. Baron Corbin has…something. Yes, he has his critics. But he’s also extremely easy to dislike. So while WWE used him as the on-screen scapegoat for the crappy shows we’ve been getting, I’m pleased they haven’t tossed him by the wayside completely. The “constable” role was great for him. Now lets see if he can transition some of that into the ring.

Brock Lesnar refuses to get in the ring with Braun Strowman. This was just brutal. The awkwardness was palpable almost from the get-go. It felt like Braun forgot his lines or something. What the heck happened?

This match was already tarnished going in, as we’ve already seen it several times, and Strowman has yet to pick up a win over Lesnar. But this segment just added insult to the whole thing by making him look like a moron.

I’m getting pretty nervous for Strowman here. If he doesn’t beat Brock at the Rumble, I’m not sure what you do with him. We’re venturing dangerously close to Ryback territory…

Apollo Crews and Ember Moon def. Jinder Mahal and Alicia Fox. Happy to see Ember Moon get a win. But while I’ve always loved Apollo Crews’ athleticism, until he either gets a mouthpiece or a personality, I’m not interested.

After Ronda Rousey appears announces she wants to prove herself against Sasha Banks, Banks defeats Nia Jax to earn a Raw Women’s Title Match at the Royal Rumble. That botched Powerbomb spot from the apron didn’t do Nia any favors. There was also a spot in this match where she dropped Sasha on the top rope. It looked like Sasha took a bad fall. But in all honesty, Sasha takes a lot of bad falls in these big matches. I can’t even tell which ones are accidents and which ones are on purposes. Either way, not the best showing for Nia.

I’ve talked a lot about my distaste for Sasha’s attitude. But I won’t deny I’m very curious to see what she and Ronda do at the Rumble. It could be a lot of fun.

Dean Ambrose def. Seth Rollins in a Falls Count Anywhere Match to retain the Intercontinental Title after Bobby Lashley interferes. Really good main event. Enjoyed Ambrose’s heel work here, particularly the Three Stooges eye poke to Rollins, and they way he sold the Curb Stomp.

The finish to this match was plain as day the second they announced the match. Even before the Falls Count Anywhere stip came into play. They opened with Rollins and Lashley, and they closed with them. It was the right move. Lashley had some nice heel fire during the beatdown here too. They may have beaten that “Almighty” nickname into the ground. But don’t count heel Lashley out just yet.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter, or email Rob at primaryignition@yahoo.com.