Tag Archives: Sasha Banks

WWE’s All-Women Event: Let’s Book the Show!

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

Rumor has it WWE is planning an event this fall that will be strictly for female talent. A sort of make-good for the ladies being left off the Greatest Royal Rumble show in Saudi Arabia.

I’m inclined to believe it will happen, and that they’ll  make a pay per view out of it. Why not? WWE wants to be seen as progressive. We’ve had the women main event TV shows and pay per views. They’ve had a Royal Rumble Match, an Elimination Chamber Match, Money in the Bank Ladder Matches, etc. This seems to be the next logical step.

But who or what do you put on an all-female pay per view? Supposedly, this would be like the Women’s Royal Rumble Match in that it would include names from the past. Though in truth, I’m not sure they need to do that too extensively. If they focus on telling good stories, they’ve got more than enough ladies to put on a good show. Maybe even a great one.

My usual speculation is going to look a little bit different this time. Whereas with predictions I start from the bottom of the card and work up, with this one I’ll be starting with the main event and working down. I’m also jumping to conclusions about who the champions will be once we get to this show. But with or without championships, the matches should work just fine.

And if WWE is going to promote an all-female pay per view, you know who they’ll have pegged for a main event position…

WWE RAW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
Ronda Rousey (c) vs. Natalya

The seeds for this one have obviously been planted for awhile now. It’s just a question of how long they want to wait.

I wouldn’t try and make a big Wrestlemania match out of Ronda and Nattie. But for something like this it would work just fine. There’s also a great story there if Ronda is the champion. Natalya comes from a wrestling family, and has seen the hardships it can wreak. Her husband suffered a career-ending injury in the ring. She herself spent years working her way to the top of WWE. And yet, here Ronda is with one of the top titles in the industry after less than a year.

Here’s a sad truth: Natalie Neidhart-Wilson’s contributions to the “Women’s Evolution” are largely overlooked. But in many ways she was ahead of her time. Before we had Sasha Banks, Bayley, Becky Lynch, or even someone like Paige, we had Natalya working a more sophisticated, technically sound style. The first Charlotte Flair match that really got people buzzing was with Nattie at the inaugural NXT Takeover show.

Here’s where I’m going with this: Nattie deserves to main event a show like this. Future generations will look back on her the way we now look back at names like Molly Holly.

LADDER MATCH FOR WWE SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S TITLE:
Asuka (c) vs. Charlotte Flair

If the die-hards aren’t hooked by Ronda vs. Nattie, this should do the trick.

I’ve touched on this a little bit already, but WWE needs to work on rebuilding Asuka a bit. She lost her undefeated streak at Wrestlemania, then she lost to Carmella at Money in the Bank, failing to win the Smackdown Women’s Championship on both occasions. It was once unthinkable that someone could beat Asuka. Now she’s dangerously close to becoming just another woman on the roster.

As such, Asuka needs to beat Carmella at Extreme Rules. Then she needs to retain over Charlotte Flair at Summerslam, with this being the rubber match. The ladder is some nice icing on the cake. Though I’ll admit, I’m nervous about Charlotte potentially doing one of her moonsaults off the damn thing.

Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

One of the highlights of this year’s Women’s Royal Rumble was Mickie James and Trish Stratus being in the ring together for the first time in over a decade. The fans popped big. It was the first time Mickie hast generated that kind of buzz since she’s been back.

So if the people want to see it again, let’s give it to them!

As you’ll see, I’m reticent about giving alumni prominent spots on this show. Because, and I’m sorry to say this, most of them weren’t that good at the Rumble. But there were exceptions. (Michelle McCool, Beth Phoenix, Molly Holly hitting the Molly-Go-Round.) Trish was one of them. I wouldn’t ask her to go 30 minutes with Charlotte or Sasha. But a veteran like Mickie can carry a match with her as a special attraction.

2/3 FALLS MATCH:
Sasha Banks vs. Bayley

By the time we get here, I assume Sasha and Bayley will have had a couple of pay per view matches already. So this is my attempt at letting these two blow off this program once and for all by putting on a clinic. I don’t know if can top their famous NXT Takeover: Brooklyn match.  But they can certainly try. The winner of this match would theoretically be in line for a Raw Women’s Title Match. That’s a natural doorway to Ronda vs. Sasha, if you ask me.

#1 CONTENDER MATCH:
Becky Lynch vs. Naomi vs. Carmella

Admittedly, this is a throw-together match. I had originally put Becky with Charlotte, but figured Charlotte vs. Asuka would be the bigger match. I do think Charlotte vs. Becky would be money, though. It’s well documented that those two are good friends.

On the upside, I would have Becky win this one. While WWE loves their multi-person matches, I’d keep it at three here. No need to muddy the waters. If they want to put more Smackdown ladies out there for this one, they can put somebody on commentary. Peyton Royce and Billie Kay come to mind. But they could have Lana do it as well.

Lita & Ember Moon vs. Alexa Bliss & Victoria

A little more nostalgia in this one. I like Lita being with a spiritual successor in Ember Moon. As for Victoria, she was conspicuous by her absence at the Royal Rumble, and deserves a spotlight like this. She’s also a great heel. So she makes sense for this spot.

Inevitably, Lita has to do a moonsault in this match. But for crying out loud, lady, please be careful. That one at the Rumble scared me…

STIPULATION HANDICAP MATCH:
Nia Jax vs. The Riott Squad
If Nia loses, her head is shaved.
If the Riott Squad loses, Ruby’s head is shaved.

We see Handicap Matches on Raw all the time. But I like the idea of the larger Nia Jax against the three Riott Squad members. The hair stipulation makes for some nice garnish. Plus, I bet Ruby looks good bald!

The caveat here is that Ruby might be injured and unable to wrestle. If that’s the case, depending on how much she’s healed at this point, I say you keep her on TV as much as possible. Have her mentor Liv Morgan and Sarah Logan in backstage segments.

On the subject of backstage segments, it would be cute if after the match, Molly Holly came up to a freshly bald Ruby Riott and said something like, “Don’t worry kid, it’ll grow back.”

NXT WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
Kairi Sane (c) vs. Shayna Baszler

Without spoiling anything, unless something unexpected happens, this match will very happen again in the very near future. I see Kairi Sane winning her first NXT Women’s Championship in that encounter. This would be Baszler’s rematch for the belt.

Normally I’d be reticent to put NXT matches on a main roster card. But given what NXT has done for women’s wrestling in the last few years, to not include this championship on a show like this almost seems improper.

Shayna Baszler and Kairi Sane also wrestled in the inaugural Mae Young Classic. So they can tell that story, and connect it to this year’s tournament. I assume it will be over by the time we get here. But if it isn’t, having the finals on this show would be tremendous.

James Ellsworth Open Challenge

“Aw c’mon! Ellsworth has no place wrestling on an all-female pay per view! It was bad enough when he helped Carmella win the first Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match! It’s disgusting! It’s a disgrace!”

Shut up. It’s pro wrestling, not the Olympics.

Part of Ellsworth’s character is that he wrestles women. And he loses. Every single time. So obviously he loses here too. They went to the trouble of bringing him back. So let’s use him! Have him go out there and throw out an open challenge to any woman in all of WWE.

There are a couple directions they can go in here. One is to bring an alumni out. Beth Phoenix would be a great choice for this spot. She’d hit a clothesline, a press slam, a Glam Slam, and then be done.

On the other hand, they could put Lana in there. She’s billed at 5’7, while Ellsworth is about 5’8. Weight wise, they can’t be too far from each other. So you can have that moment of tension, in which it actually looks like Ellsworth can beat Lana up. Then you maybe have her do a high-kick and knock him out. Either way, same kind of match.

Email Rob at PrimaryIgnition@yahoo.com, or follow Primary Ignition on Twitter.

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WWE Money in the Bank Predictions – Get Ready for Ronda!

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

You know, I was going to write a little bit about CM Punk here. But looking at the Money in the Bank card, we’ve got a lot of ground to cover.

So let’s not waste any time. We’ve got some good ol’ fashioned speculatin’ to do…

Bobby Lashley vs. Sami Zayn

All we can hope here is that our destination is better than our journey. WWE has done Bobby Lashley no favors with this creative. There’s a difference between being soft-spoken and being a chump. From a personality standpoint, Lashley has indeed come off like a chump in this program with Sami Zayn. We need to see that this guy has another gear. We need to see that he can get angry. When Zayn mades that “Did you really serve in the military?” comment, Lashley should have rushed after him. Because he should have been pissed. Instead, this all feels wishy washy because there’s so little emotion involved.

Either way, Lashley beats Zayn here. They seem to really want Lashley to be a headline guy. But as was the case the first time around, for whatever reason they just can’t get him there.

PREDICTION: Bobby Lashley

WWE SMACKDOWN TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH:
The Bludgeon Brothers (c) vs. Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson

There’s been a decent amount of speculation lately about where the Authors of Pain have been, and why they disappeared from Raw so quickly after their debut. Supposedly WWE didn’t have any plans for them. I’m wondering if they’ve decided to move them to Smackdown so they can challenge the Bludgeon Brothers for the tag belts at some point. Right now, the only other team I can see beating them is the Bar. But I’m not exactly sold on that. You might be thinking SAnitY, but they’ve been MIA as well.

Either way, it’s not going to be Gallows and Anderson. Sorry, brothers.

PREDICTION: The Bludgeon Brothers

Daniel Bryan vs. Big Cass

Thus far, Cass’ singles push has gone strictly okay. That’s not to say there isn’t potential there. But it’s very obvious that he’s new at this. Still, as I’ve said before, he’s in good hands out there with Bryan. The right guy won when these two wrestled at Backlash. Despite the size difference, Bryan is much more experienced and a much better pure wrestler. Now I think it’s time for Cass to get a victory. Not necessarily a clean one. But something to justify a third match at Extreme Rules next month. Because that’s probably where this is going.

PREDICTION: Big Cass

Roman Reigns vs. Jinder Mahal

Watch them make this the main event…

They might actually give this one to Jinder. Like Bryan and Cass, I can see them going to Extreme Rules with this one. (Let’s just hope they don’t make it another Punjabi Prison Match.) Roman can beat him there, and then go on to face Brock for the title yet again at Summerslam. Because yes, I guarantee you that’s where they go with this. Best case scenario, it winds up being a Triple Threat Match with somebody like Seth Rollins in there too.

PREDICTION: Jinder Mahal

WWE INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH:
Seth Rollins (c) vs. Elias

I haven’t been into Raw very much lately. But this Seth Rollins/Elias stuff has been a notable exception. Rollins is a hot Intercontinental Champion, and Elias would make a hell of an IC Champ in his own right. The stuff with the guitar has been simple but effective.

I don’t see them taking the title off Rollins just yet. But Extreme Rules (Notice a theme developing here?) might be another story. Elias can win the belt in some kind of gimmick match. Then, God willing, Rollins can work in the main event of Summerslam. His resurgence in popularity after that Gauntlet Match on Raw has been really cool to see. Let’s hope he can ride that wave all the way back to the top of the card.

PREDICTION: Seth Rollins

WWE SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
Carmella (c) vs. Asuka

I have no desire to see Asuka lose another match. She’s teetering dangerously close to being just another woman on the roster. That’s the opposite of what she should be. Especially after they pushed her to the moon.

But I’m not ready to see Carmella drop the title either. She’s been a lot of fun on TV these past few months. So I’m thinking this is one of those rare instances where a disqualification or count-out finish is necessary in a pay per view match. Fans balked when she pinned Charlotte at Backlash. So let’s not do that again. Have her weasel her way out, and then go to a three-way title match with Asuka and Charlotte down the road. Summerslam, maybe?

PREDICTION: Carmella

WOMEN’S MONEY IN THE BANK LADDER MATCH:
Charlotte Flair vs. Alexa Bliss vs. Sasha Banks vs. Natalya vs. Becky Lynch vs. Naomi vs. Ember Moon vs. Lana

Lana in a Ladder Match, huh? That seems needlessly risky…

In predicting these Money in the Bank matches, for me it’s always process of elimination. I always look at who either doesn’t need the briefcase or isn’t ready for it yet. Two names we can knock out immediately are Charlotte and Lana. You can seemingly give Charlotte a title shot any time, as she’s that good. Lana, on the other hand, might not even deserve to be in this match. I’m legit worried for her.

Alexa Bliss and Naomi…meh. Kind of a waste of the briefcase. I’m sure a program between Bliss and Ronda Rousey is on the horizon anyway, and it might actually be time to give Naomi a fresh coat of paint. The whole “feel the glow” thing is has gotten old. Sasha Banks doesn’t necessarily need it either, though I admit she’d at least be interesting.

Becky Lynch is always a bridesmaid and never a bride. Does she deserve to win? Yes. Will she? No. For now, that’s just her lot in life.

So it comes down to either Ember Moon or Natalya. The former is a fresh NXT call-up who’s turning a lot of heads, and could gain a lot with a big win here. On the other hand, Natalya is obviously about to work a big program with Ronda Rousey. That’s a story they have a lot of money invested in via Ronda. The briefcase would obviously be a great dramatic tool in that regard. When you look at it that way, it almost seems obvious.

PREDICTION: Natalya

LAST MAN STANDING MATCH FOR WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE:
AJ Styles (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

At the risk of pissing off smart fans, this whole program has been a disappointment. Simply put, these guys were victims of their own hype. Not to mention bad creative. This could have been an epic back-and-forth between two of the industry’s best and brightest. Instead, it became about low blows and ball shots.

What’s more, for all the good the heel turn has done him, I don’t think Nakamura gets the belt here. I still don’t think he’s ready for it. At this point, I think we’d be better served doing Styles vs. Samoa Joe, or even Styles vs. Daniel Bryan. For now, Nakamura has missed his window. After the awesome moment he had at the Royal Rumble this year, that’s a damn shame. But like Lashley and Zayn, I think the best we can hope for here is for them to stick the landing.

PREDICTION: AJ Styles

MEN’S MONEY IN THE BANK LADDER MATCH:
The Miz vs. Kevin Owens vs. Finn Balor vs. Samoa Joe vs. Bobby Roode vs. Braun Strowman vs. Rusev vs. [New Day Member]

Despite the buzz about Big E, the New Day member that joins this match is probably going to be Kofi Kingston. Given his proficiency with high spots, and how experienced he is in these matches, that seems pretty obvious. It’s almost a moot point anyway, as the New Day isn’t getting the briefcase.

Braun Strowman isn’t either, as he clearly doesn’t need it. Kevin Owens and Samoa Joe wouldn’t disappoint with it, but I don’t think they need it either.

Rusev is the Becky Lynch of this match, in that he probably should get it, but won’t. Finn Balor is almost in that same spot. It seems like he’s one or two big wins away from getting his momentum back, much like Seth Rollins did. But while I’d love to be wrong, I don’t see this for him right now.

I’d be okay with Bobby Roode winning this match if it meant they were going to tweak his character. This guy was okay as a babyface when he first came in. But these days he’s drowning. WWE seems to know that, and since he’s come to Raw it feels like they’ve been slowly inching him in that direction. If a Money in the Bank win can further that story, I’m all for it.

But in the end, I think Miz becomes the second man to win a Money in the Bank Ladder Match more than once. I’d argue he falls into the same “doesn’t need it” camp as Owens and Joe. But he’s been on such a roll lately that something extra like this could be the boost he needs to really take off into the stratosphere. The fact that he and Maryse are about to get their own reality show on USA Network doesn’t hurt his case either.

Don’t kid yourself, folks. Miz can be the centerpiece of Smackdown. In fact, I think it’s only a matter of time.

PREDICTION: The Miz

WWE RAW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
Nia Jax (c) vs. Ronda Rousey

They really couldn’t contain themselves, could they? And yes, I think they’re going to do it. Ronda Rousey wins the Raw Women’s Championship in her first singles match.

For a moment, set aside the fact that Rousey is about to be the first female inductee into the UFC Hall of Fame, and WWE being able to leech even more publicity off of that by giving her the belt. Ronda winning the title in her first pay per view match tells a interesting story. It gets people talking. It opens some interesting doors too. Obviously, every other woman on the roster will be able to point at Ronda and say, “She doesn’t deserve that! She didn’t earn it!” Thus, Ronda has to prove she deserves it by beating them one by one on pay per view. It’s an easy segue into matches with women like Sasha Banks, Alexa Bliss, Mickie James, and of course Natalya. Naturally, Nia Jax will get a rematch as well.

And for the record, as fans, let’s not get a stick up our ass about Ronda being champion. This whole Diva’s Revolution/Women’s Evolution thing would never have happened without her becoming a star in the UFC. That’s not to take anything away from what Charlotte, Sasha, Becky, or anyone else did to make it happen. But if Ronda Rousey doesn’t become the mega-attraction that she does, what incentive does WWE have to put them in main events? Or give them ample time at shows like Wrestlemania? Or market them the way they do now? Would it have happened eventually anyway? Maybe. But it didn’t happen until Ronda kicked that door down for everybody.

This could all be much ado about nothing, of course. Natalya, or somebody else from the Raw side, could easily cash in during this match and steal the belt before Ronda can win it. That’s another a good story possibility. But I think it happens here.

Go get ’em, Ronda.

PREDICTION: Ronda Rousey

Email Rob at PrimaryIgnition@yahoo.com, or follow Primary Ignition on Twitter.

Wrestling Headlines: CM Punk in Court, Enzo’s “Consensual Penis,” and More!

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

I actually thought this was going to be a slow news week. Turns out, not so much.

The Dr. Chris Amann/CM Punk/Colt Cabana case goes to trial. Like so many others who heard it, I was enthralled by the now infamous CM Punk/Colt Cabana podcast on Punk’s departure from WWE. So all these years later, it’s fascinating to see the fallout involving WWE’s Dr. Chris Amann. I’ve been following the coverage on WrestleZone.

Amann was treating Punk in the months prior to his WWE departure, and is suing for defamation. The real-life Phil Brooks said Amann misdiagnosed a staph infection, which lead to months of suffering. Amann refutes the accusation, and is seeking $1 million in damages.

WWE officials and personalities such as Kane, referee John Cone, and WWE’s Senior Director of Talent Relations Mark Carrano all testified via recording about Punk’s participation in the 2014 Royal Rumble Match the night before he walked out. It’s incredibly surreal to read their recollections, as they use all this pro wrestling jargon in a legal setting. Kane mentioned eliminating Punk from the Rumble “illegally.” Carrano described Punk after the Rumble as “one angry superstar.” It’s so weird…

In a bit of bizarre hilarity, the jury actually had to watch footage of Punk being eliminate by Kane in the 2014 Royal Rumble, which took place the night before his famous walk-out. When the judge said he didn’t know who Kane was, someone reportedly told him: “The big guy without a shirt on.”

Also, it’s now on record that the “CM” in CM Punk stands for “Chick Magnet.” So that’s a thing now, I guess…

Meanwhile, Punk’s next UFC fight is on June 9. It should be interesting to say the least.

The former Enzo Amore releases a rap video, calling himself Real1. Enzo isn’t exactly Jay-Z, and I’m not exactly sure what to make of what I’m seeing here. But this video does have over a million views. So he’s got that going for him…

Silly imagery aside, he’s rapping about a very real situation. Earlier this year the real-life Eric Arndt was the subject of a rape investigation, and ultimately fired by WWE for not cluing them in on it. The investigation was ultimately dropped due to insufficient evidence.

I hope to God I’m never in the position this guy was in. But if I am, I probably wont release any kind of public statement, rap or otherwise, that talks about “gripping my consensual penis.” It’s also probably not a good idea to alienate wrestling fans, many of whom were chanting “We want Enzo!” at Big Cass not long ago.

But hey, that’s just me.

John Cena says the Velveteen Dream might be “something special.” Cena was at MegaCon in Orlando this week, and someone asked him a question about facing wrestlers from NXT. While he also mentioned EC3 by name, the one he really put over was the Velveteen Dream.

“You know how in the Star Wars movies the old Jedis can look at the rookie Jedis and be like, ‘I think that’s the one,’” Cena said. “I kinda have a weird, odd Midichlorian feeling about Velveteen Dream. I think there’s something special there.”

That’s a hell of an endorsement for the real-life Patrick Clark Jr. But if you’ve seen the guy, you know it’s not exactly unfounded. I highly recommend his match with Aleister Black from NXT TakeOver: War Games.

Sasha Banks wins Women’s Gauntlet Match to take final spot in Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match. This match didn’t do much for me, mostly because the quick eliminations of Liv Morgan and Sarah Logan left a bad taste in my mouth. I understand wanting to give the women a spotlight like this. But if you’ve got younger ones on the roster that can’t hang in a match like this, keep them out! Morgan and Logan could have stayed on the outside and helped Ruby Riott beat Bayley, Mickie James, and Dana Brooke, only to have Sasha overcome the odds at the end.

Ruby ended up being the star here. She’s obviously a good hand in the ring. But she also has such a unique look, and can cut a decent promo. They obviously thought enough of her to give her a group named after her. I’ve got high hopes.

Samoa Joe def. Daniel Bryan and Big Cass to take the last spot in the Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match. So Cass wasn’t really hurt? Or at least he’s well enough to keep wrestling? Good. In terms of being a singles star, he doesn’t quite have it yet. But he might get there. Working with guys like Bryan and Joe certainly won’t hurt him.

Cedric Alexander def. Buddy Murphy to retain the WWE Cruiserweight Championship. I haven’t had a chance to watch a lot of 205 Live lately. But I heard some good buzz about this Cedric Alexander/Buddy Murphy match. Damn, I forgot how good 205 Live has become. Not being on Raw every week has also done Cedric a lot of good. He still comes off pretty bland. But he’s athletic as hell. And the development of Buddy Murphy as a character has been a pleasant surprise. This one’s worth checking out, folks.

Email Rob at PrimaryIgnition@yahoo.com, or follow Primary Ignition on Twitter.

WWE Superstar Shake-Up Predictions: The Miz, Jeff Hardy, Becky Lynch, and more!

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

First of all, I hate the name “Superstar Shake-Up.” Can we please just go back to calling it the draft?

Secondly, now that Wrestlemania has come and gone, it’s once again time to reshuffle the deck between Raw, Smackdown, NXT, and even 205 Live. It’s no secret that last year Smackdown got gutted. My hope is that they’ll do a better job of leveling the playing field this year. We can also hope they’ll inject a little more drama into it than simply having the draftees just walk out there.

With that, here’s what I guess you’d call a “Mock-Up Shake-Up” of sorts. My various draft picks. Some of these have been talked about for quite awhile, and some are a little more fresh. We’ll kick it off with a man who just returned to television this week…

Jeff Hardy to Smackdown

Now that Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt are a team, Jeff is free to be his own man. And as we’ve seen in the past, when he’s his own man Jeff is pretty damn good. As in, multiple time former Heavyweight Champion good. There are a lot of really interesting  dance partners for Jeff on Smackdown, not the least of which is the WWE Champion himself, AJ Styles. Whether WWE would once again trust Jeff in a lead role remains to be seen. But he’s stood at the top of Smackdown before. He can do it again.

Becky Lynch to Raw.

Becky Lynch is criminally underutilized on Smackdown. I mean it. It’s actually a crime, and someone should be prosecuted for it. The fans love her, and she’s got all the talent in the world. Let’s give her a new sandbox to play in, and maybe she can pick up some speed again. A feud with a heel Sasha Banks would be a great start. But you’ve also got Asuka and Ember Moon on the Raw side of things. And lest we forget Ronda Rousey. While I doubt she’d win, seeing Becky face Ronda in a battle of the arm bars could be fun.

Bayley to Smackdown

Sasha Banks and Bayley need to get away from one another. They’ve been teasing a big match between them for months, but they’ve missed their window. At this point, they’d be best served to just draft Bayley to Smackdown and come back to it later. The Bayley character can thrive if she’s put with a good heel. Carmella might be able to fill that role. But a better candidate might be Natalya. That could work really well  if they don’t make the same mistakes they made with Bayley and Alexa Bliss.

The Usos to Raw.

Jimmy and Jey reinvented themselves on Smackdown, and became one of the best teams in the entire industry. But now it’s time for something new. For months now, the Smackdown Tag Team Division has essentially been the Usos and the New Day. So like Sasha and Bayley, they need to get away from each other. A move to Raw can facilitate a feud between the Usos and the Bar, not to mention the newly called-up Authors of Pain. The prospect of the Usos vs. The Revival doesn’t exactly send me running either.

Finn Balor to Smackdown

Finn Balor can be one of the top guys in WWE. But it’s been a year since he came back, and he has yet to fully regain his momentum. Competing for real estate with the Shield didn’t help matters, nor did an embarrassing program with Bray Wyatt. Finn should be one of the cool kids on the block. So let’s move him to Smackdown and see if he can gain some traction in a smaller pond. Putting him on the same roster with AJ Styles could open up some really interesting doors. And that’s to say nothing of guys like Shinsuke Nakamura, Sami Zayn, and even Daniel Bryan…

Naomi to Raw. This one is two-fold. Firstly, if her real-life husband Jimmy Uso is moving to Raw, then it would be a dick move not to put Naomi there as well. Secondly, Naomi got a nice momentum boost by winning the Wrestlemania Women’s Battle Royal. So a move to Raw would be more impactful. In terms of new opponents and feuds for Naomi, she already has some history with Sasha Banks and Alexa Bliss. Nia Jax is a route they could take, but I can’t say I’m overly enthused about it. Ditto for Asuka and Ember Moon. Actually, looking at the number of babyfaces compared to the number of babyfaces in the Raw Women’s Division, Naomi may want to consider a turn to the dark side.

Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson to Smackdown

The Club, meaning the trio of Finn Balor, Luke Gallows, and Karl Anderson, have something very important going for them: The Cool Factor. At Raw 25, they put those three guys in there with DX to do the whole “Too Sweet” thing. It was something of a passing of the torch moment, and that says a lot. So if Finn is going to Smackdown, Gallows and Anderson need to join him. Hopefully they can establish themselves as more serious contenders for tag team gold, as opposed to having silly Halloween matches with Heath Slater and Rhyno.

Mojo Rawley to Raw.

I’m moving Mojo to Raw primarily so he can get away from Zack Ryder. Yes, the Hype Bros were a thing. The team served its purpose and got Mojo on to the main roster. But it’s over now, and the feud between the two has been tepid at best. Mojo needs somebody new to work with, and bounce his charisma off of. For whatever reason, I can specifically picture him working against either Titus Worldwide or Goldust. The latter certainly wouldn’t hurt, as he could get a hell of an education.

Sonya DeVille to Smackdown

Now that Paige is the Smackdown General Manager, I think we can safely say Absolution is no more. Ergo, there’s no reason Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville need to be together anymore. And as I’ve said before, Sonya desperately needs to drop this MMA persona she’s got. Or at least develop it a little more. Putting her on the same roster as Ronda Rousey does her no favors at all. So lets shift her over to Smackdown and see what happens. Worst case scenario, Paige is there now. So they can use that association to develop her character a little more.

Randy Orton to Raw.

Orton doesn’t necessarily need to go to Raw. But he does need a change. The whole Viper persona has been stale for a few years now, and I think the “RKO Outta Nowhere” thing is a little old too. It felt like they only gave him the United States Title so he’d have something to do at Wrestlemania. At the very least, moving to Raw will give Randy a fresh environment to work in, with fresh opponents. If he says babyface, he can go against Samoa Joe or Elias. If he goes heel, as he apparently wants to, they can put him with Braun Strowman, Bobby Lashley, or even have him feud with Seth Rollins again. Either way, a move to Raw would be a bandage on the larger problem.

The Miz to Smackdown

It seems like he says it every week. But it’s true. Miz has indeed made the Intercontinental Title feel important again. In 2018, if you think of that title, you think of him.

So let’s take it away from him.

In other words, let’s use the momentum the Miz has built to push him into the WWE Title picture on Smackdown. The current champion is AJ Styles, one of the most well respected and best pure wrestlers on the planet. With respect he’s essentially the opposite of the Miz. They’d make natural opponents. A move to Smackdown would also open the door for a match with Miz’s longtime rival Daniel Bryan. While I’m not sure they can wait that long, WWE could do that match at next year’s Wrestlemania if they wanted to.

However, if Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel wind up staying on Raw, the Miz is going to need a new Miztourage. Whether it’s Maryse or Dallas and Axel, when it comes to Miz the garnish completes the presentation. With a new baby in the house, I expect we won’t be seeing Maryse for awhile. So we’ll need to put somebody new with him…

Enter Fandango and Tyler Breeze, a.k.a. the Fashion Police. Their comedy gimmick has run its course. So let’s let them bump around as Miz’s lackeys for a little while. A heel turn could do them some good.

Email Rob at PrimaryIgnition@yahoo.com, or follow Primary Ignition on Twitter.

 

Wrestlemania Predictions: Kick-Off Show Matches

By Rob Siebert
Fanboy Wonder

We’re going to try something a little different this year. Instead of cramming all my Wrestlemania predictions into one big post, I’m going to break them up over the next few days. If there was ever a show to do that with, it’s this one. As I type this, 13 matches have been announced. That’s not counting whatever is happening with Cena and Undertaker, and the segment that Elias is reportedly doing.

Up first is the Kick-Off Show, which was the subject of controversy last year when the matches weren’t included on the Wrestlemania 33 DVD. Thus, the talents didn’t see any royalties. Plus, there’s always been that pre-show stigma. You don’t break into the business hoping to get on the Wrestlemania Kick-Off Show.

Still, you’ve got a good amount of star power here. And a championship will be decided. So let’s take a look…

2018 ANDRE THE GIANT MEMORIAL BATTLE ROYAL:

Bray Wyatt probably needs to be in this match. We haven’t seen him since the Ultimate Deletion, when he was thrown into the “Lake of Reincarnation.” Wrestlemania is about as fitting a place as any for a reincarnated Bray to emerge. Even if it’s in a battle royal. On the pre-show…

Bray isn’t even officially announced for this match. But the more I look at the guys who are (Dolph Ziggler, Baron Corbin, Mojo Rawley, Tye Dillinger…), the more it seems like a win for Bray makes the most sense. If anyone has ever needed a repackaging and a big win, it’s him. It’s really hard to believe that he walked into last year’s Wrestlemania as the WWE Champion. Plus, Matt Hardy is in this match. So it can come down to those two.

But of course, this match is notoriously hard to predict. Last year I thought it would be Braun Strowman, and it wound up being Mojo Rawley. So as always, this one’s a toss-up.

PREDICTION: Bray Wyatt

WRESTLEMANIA WOMEN’S BATTLE ROYAL:

Obviously it sucks that Sasha Banks and Bayley don’t have a match on the main show. But they’ve got the big story coming into this battle royal. That’s hardly ideal, of course. But it’s something.

According to WWE.com, we’ll be seeing some NXT names in this match as well. I expect Kairi Sane to be in there. Depending on what happens in the NXT Women’s Title Match at Takeover, we might see Shayna Baszler and/or Ember Moon. I’d throw Bille Kay and Peyton Royce in there too.

I’d love for it to be Becky Lynch. It won’t be, of course. She’s the personification of “always a bridesmaid, never a bride.” And that’s such a damn shame, because she’s so damn great.

That being said, you know who I’d like to see win this one? Mandy Rose. Absolution’s shelf life has been up for quite awhile now. Particularly since Paige got injured. And as a heel, Rose has a lot of potential for single’s stardom. She’s obviously not as polished as she could be. But that’s a matter of experience. While this one is every bit the toss-up the men’s battle royal is, I don’t see Mandy as a bad choice at all.

WWE likes to talk about how the Andre Battle Royal has meant so much to the various winners over the years. But has it? Not really. Mojo Rawley is in more or less the same spot he was last year at this time. But that doesn’t mean it can‘t be that launching pad for a newer name. The men’s match has essentially been established as filler. But this is a valuable opportunity for WWE to  start this tradition for the women on a different note.

Just be careful who you name the match after…

MATCH FOR VACANT WWE CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE:
Cedric Alexander vs. Mustafa Ali

Yeah…we knew this would end up on the pre-show, didn’t we? It’s a crappy thing to do, given how well the 205 Live revamp has gone. But I get it. There’s only so much you can fit on that main show. Look at it this way: At least they have a featured match. That’s more than you can say for the likes of Bray Wyatt, Dolph Ziggler, Sasha Banks, or Bayley…

If I’ve got the book, I put the title on Mustafa Ali. They’ve been trying to push Cedric as a babyface for several months now. And as amazing and talented as Cedric is, it’s not working. He’s missing something in the charisma department. So how do you fix that? you have him come up short in his big quest for the championship. He can go heel in response, and win the title from Ali down the line.

All that being said, I think they’re going with Cedric. They clearly see him as a star, and they’re not wrong in that assessment. I just think there’s a different path for him.

PREDICTION: Cedric Alexander

More predictions to come!!!

Email Rob at PrimaryIgnition@yahoo.com, or follow Primary Ignition on Twitter.

Kurt Angle’s Acting Woes, Plus Ponderings From Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

You know who we really could use right about now? The Big Show.

Or at least someone like Big Show. People can say what they want about the pace he cuts in the ring. But that guy can take WWE’s scripted material and act the hell out of it. We’ve seen him break down and cry on live television. He can garner an amazing amount of sympathy for someone so big and powerful. Case in point, those segments from a few years ago when Stephanie McMahon would blackmail him into doing the Authority’s bidding.

Kurt Angle really needs some acting tips from the giant. Because they’re trying to cast him in a similar role heading into Wrestlemania. Coming off the contract signing at Elimination Chamber, it’s obvious Ronda Rousey’s first WWE match will see her team with Angle against Triple H and Stephanie McMahon. Rousey has taken to sticking up for the Raw General Manager as he’s been condescended to, belittled, and as we saw on Raw this week, outright attacked by WWE’s power couple.

The trouble is that in trying to recite WWE’s scripted dialogue, Angle often comes off like a bumbling fool. A likable fool, perhaps. But still a fool. That undercuts the story they’re trying to tell. And one with pretty high stakes, considering all they’ve invested in Rousey. On paper, Angle is a fantastic choice to team with Rousey. But depending how they script this, he could wind up dragging her down.

There could be one saving grace, however. Remember when Triple H surprised Angle with a Pedigree at Survivor Series? The next night on Raw, Angle marched up to him and said if he ever did it again, “…you can take this job and shove it, because I’m comin’ for you!” We’re inevitably going to see that Kurt Angle again in the next few weeks. The Raw General Manager will go away, and the Olympic champion will return. That’s got the potential to be a hell of a moment, and Rousey’s presence will only accentuate it.

If they can’t make this thing work from a story perspective, then maybe they can pump in a little more of that big fight feel….

Other Ponderings From Raw:

Alexa Bliss and Mickie James open the show. Asuka emerges, but walks into a trap set by Bliss, James, and Nia Jax. Sasha Banks and Bayley join the fight, and a six-woman tag match is made. The babyfaces prevail, despite Bayley refusing to tag Banks out of a predicament. God damn. Alexa Bliss cuts a career promo for the second night in a row. This woman is money on the mic. I don’t know if it’s right to call her an overachiever or not. But she’s damn sure maximized her minutes.

Supposedly, Sasha Banks and Alexa Bliss had legit heat at one point. Supposedly Banks didn’t think she had legit passion for the business. Seeing how well they work together, I wonder if that’s still a thing…

Banks isn’t a full fledged heel yet. But she’s damn close, and she’s that much better for it.

Question: Why exactly did Mickie James turn heel? I missed that memo.

John Cena talks about his failure at Elimination Chamber, challenging the Undertaker, and earning a match at Wrestlemania by moving to Smackdown. The big news item coming out of this segment was Cena announcing he will not be wrestling the Undertaker in New Orleans. Mind you, that doesn’t mean it’s not happening. It just means he said it’s not happening. Time will tell.

Personally, I think ‘Taker shows up at Wrestlemania. The fan interest is obviously there, as illustrated by how the crowd popped when Cena said his name. But after what we saw from him last year, I wouldn’t be heartbroken if he is fact done. If anyone has earned the right to stay retired, it’s him.

Bray Wyatt destroys Heath Slater and Rhyno, says the “great war” with Matt Hardy is far from over. STOP LAUGHING, you idiot. You lost a big match. On pay per view. Again. You’re on the road to becoming as much of a jobber as…well, Heath Slater and Rhyno.

After an impassioned promo from the Miz, the Intercontinental Champion loses a non-title match to Seth Rollins. Finn Balor comes out to upstage Rollins’ win. Miz is in a really special place right now. He was always a good mic guy. He became a great mic guy. But when he cuts promos like the one he did on this show, he proves he’s becoming one of the greatest promos of his generation. Not just the passion he spoke with, but some of the little entitled character bits he threw in there. And of course, he got to look in to the camera, which never hurts a damn bit. Homie was in the zone out there.

I wasn’t around last week to talk about it. But Seth Rollins’ stock is pretty damn high after last week. Probably as high as it’s been since he turned face. I’m well aware I’m not the first to say this, but I’ll say it anyway: Last week Rollins put on one of the best performances in Raw history. That being said, a lot of fans got swept up in the afterglow of the match, declaring Rollins could now feasibly be put against Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania. Assuming Roman Reigns went down with an injury, of course.

No. Just, no.

I’ve never taken anything away from this guy’s talent or his drive. He’s one of the best in the world right now. But the Seth Rollins character isn’t ready for a big match like that. He took a big step in that direction week. But he still needs to give us a little more to latch on to. Calling him the “Kingslayer,” or worse “the Architect” does nothing for his identity.

It’s a shame, especially when you look at some of the stuff this guy does out there, i.e. that freakish Frog Splash across the ring.

Finn Balor def. The Miz. So are we looking at a Fatal Four-Way for Wrestlemania? Miz vs. Rollins vs. Balor vs. Strowman? Or is Strowman even in the IC Title hunt anymore? You’d think he would be after what we saw in the Chamber Match.

Roman Reigns: “Brock Lesnar is an entitled piece of crap who hides behind his contract.” They were smart to play this card. It’s similar to the one Cena played against the Rock several years ago. The loyalty card. The full-timer/part-timer card. The “I care and he doesn’t” card. It’s simple, but effective. Because it’s rooted in truth. Roman is there almost every week, Brock isn’t.

Between Alexa Bliss and the Miz, I’ve talked a lot about mic work this week. While I wouldn’t call Roman a great talker, he can deliver big when he’s got something to sink his teeth into. He showed us that here tonight.

I highly doubt it’ll get Roman cheered any more than he would have been otherwise. But it’s about as good a shot as they can take.

The Bar def. Titus O’Neil and Apollo in a 2/3 Falls Match to retain the WWE Raw Tag Team Titles. The champs gloat on the mic. Sheamus and Cesaro have a point. Who have they got left to beat? Is it time to call up a team from NXT? This close to Wrestlemania, that seems doubtful.

Braun Strowman def. Elias via disqualification. This one really dragged. But both these guys are hot right now. I’ve actually been on quite the Elias kick lately. To the point that I actually looked forward to his song routine this week.

So are these two headed to Wrestlemania? Seems like that might be the case…

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The Elias/John Cena Connection, Plus Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

I found myself on a podcast binge this past Sunday. Among my backlogged shows were two respective episodes of The Steve Austin Show and E and C’s Pod of Awesomeness. As if by fate, the both happened to feature the same guest: Elias.

I hadn’t realized just how into this guy I was. But I found myself listening pretty intently to what he had to say, and it occurred to me: If portrayed the right way, Elias could be huge. To an extent, he actually reminds me of John Cena. Not necessarily in terms of his personality or the way he works, but in the uniqueness of his persona.

When John Cena started using his hip hop inspired persona in 2003, it had a flair of originality to it. We’d seen wrestlers incorporate certain rap elements into their characters, but never seen anything quite like this. Once that character became more fully developed, Cena’s battle was half won. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t as polished a wrestler as most of his peers. People bought into him because was unique, and even real to an extent.

We’ve seen our share of guitar-playing wrestlers. The Honky Tonk Man comes to mind immediately, as does Jeff Jarrett. Outside the WWE umbrella you had names like Van Hammer and Maxx Payne. But Elias has an entirely different flavor. He’s got a more grounded, modern feel to him, sprinkled with a little Johnny Cash, Jim Morrison, etc. It didn’t click with the more hardcore fans in NXT. But on the mainstream level shows like Raw and Smackdown, it works.

Elias has something that’s been missing in wrestling for a long time, but seems to slowly be creeping back in. The “cool factor.” That swagger,  that demeanor, that aura that makes the male audience in particular look at you and think, “I wish I could be like him.” Names like Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Rock, Sting, and Goldberg had it. Groups like DX and the nWo had it. John Cena had it at one point. Nowadays you can see it in guys who’ve been associated with the Bullet Club. Braun Strowman has it to a degree.

We’re now starting to see traces of it in Elias. He’s hearing more boos than cheers. But give it time. Once Wrestlemania comes and goes, it wouldn’t surprise me if fans around the world are ready to walk with Elias. And when that time comes, WWE needs to be ready to pounce.

Ponderings From Raw:

John Cena opens the show, and is interrupted by the Miz. Cena challenges Miz to a match with the stipulation that the loser enters the Elimination Chamber Match first. Cena wins with the Super AA. The best line of Cena’s promo? Wrestlemania can bring a legend back from the dead.” Foreshadowing, anyone?

To anyone who’s been a fan for more than a few years, the notion of Cena not having a match at Wrestlemania is downright laughable. But that’s obviously the story they want to tell with he and Undertaker. Cena has to get a match at Wrestlemania by goading the Dead Man out of retirement.

Incidentally, I think that’s the first time I’ve ever heard an “And the loser of this match is…” announcement.

The Revival def. Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson. Anybody else see Dash Wilder trip after he got tagged in to feed for Anderson? Whoops. Still, at least they won. A hell of an improvement over their loss to Anderson and Finn Balor last week.

Kurt Angle stands up for Jason Jordan, who will miss Wrestlemania with a neck injury. Seth Rollins emerges and asks to be inserted into the Second Chance Fatal Four-Way later that night. Angle grants his wish, making it a Fatal Five-Way. Oh good. Another Fatal Five-Way. Isn’t that just so…asymmetrical.

Rollins was presumably going to work with Jason Jordan at Wrestlemania. Obviously that’s not happening anymore, which leaves Rollins without a dance partner. So who do you put him with? Angle? I doesn’t seem like the highly speculated Triple H/Kurt Angle match is on the books anymore, and Rollins would likely give Angle a better match anyway. Finn Balor might work, as they obviously have some history. There’s also the Miz, though he’s rumored to be working with Strowman.

Bayley def. Sasha Banks. Nia Jax ambushes both women after the match. Hardly their best match, but still damn good.

While the turn isn’t official, Sasha was working heel here. It’s about damn time. I’ve been ready to boo the hell out of this woman for months. What’s more, working with a heel Sasha could do wonders for Bayley. The audience needs to be reminded why they liked her in the first place. Casting Sasha as a vicious, bratty heel could garner her some valuable sympathy.

Mandy Rose and Goldust were a team on WWE Mixed Match Challenge last week. While they lost, if you watch some of the online content WWE has put out with them, they make a hell of a duo. How about we drop the Absolution stuff and make them a next-gen Goldust and Marlena?

Braun Strowman gives his own take on one of Elias’ performances, smashes the Drifter with a cello. These WWE comedy segments crash and burn so much that you wonder if they’re even worth the effort. Then something like this comes along and it almost makes the bad ones all worthwhile. Even after accidentally breaking the strings, Strowman sold the bit and made it work. And seeing him smash Elias with the cello? Priceless.

How is this man not headlining Wrestlemania? Apparently Brock doesn’t want to work with him anymore after what happened at the Rumble. So what? Brock makes a hell of a lot of money working fewer dates than almost anyone. Suck it up, buttercup.

Roman Reigns def. Sheamus. This match brings back bad memories from late 2015. But then they wind up going at each other so hard that you wind up forgiving them.

The announcers actually brought up a valid point early on in this match. A pretty damn sad point, at that. Cole noted that Sheamus may be one of the most underrated stars in WWE history. They listed of all his singles accomplishments, and then added that they’re often forgotten because he’s now in a tag team with Cesaro. Think about that. On paper this guy has a Hall of Fame resume. WWE Champion, World Heavyweight Champion, King of the Ring winner, Royal Rumble Match winner, Money in the Bank winner, US Champion. And yet all that gets glossed over.

I don’t doubt the history books will be kind to Sheamus. But I can’t help but wonder if he’ll ever get the respect he truly deserves. 

Ivory announced for WWE Hall of Fame Class of 2018. Ivory was always a favorite of mine. Ahead of her time, in that she could always do the sports entertainment stuff, but she was a wrestler’s wrestler. And a good chunk of her WWE career was spent with ladies who, with due respect, really had no business being in a wrestling ring. Thus, she had to stoop to performing in various slop matches, Evening Gown Matches, Bra and Panties Matches, and a various other things that really don’t age well. She a lot was classier than the material she was given. The real-life Lisa Moretti has earned her spot in the Hall of Fame as much as just about all of her peers. 

The “Second Chance” Fatal Five-Way Match ends in a tie between Finn Balor and Seth Rollins. Both earn a spot on the Elimination Chamber Match. We’ve never had seven guys in a Chamber Match before. I assume it’ll be three guys in the ring at the start, with the remaining four entering as usual. Either way, it doesn’t matter. Roman Reigns is winning.

It’s curious that they’d put Apollo Crews in this match. In terms of his spot on the card, he was clearly below everyone else in that match. The good news, however, is that he definitely held his own out there. I feel like I talk about how athletic this guy is every single week. This was a hell of a chance to show off, and I think he took full advantage of it. Also, Apollo has some personality buried in there somewhere. We just need to dig…

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