A Shield Reunion Looms, Plus Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

The Twitterverse hasn’t been kind to Sunday’s Battleground pay per view. There are a variety of reasons why. But one of the prominent ones has to do with the big guy on the right. The Great Khali is back.

Oh…great.

The seven-foot giant helped Jinder Mahal retain the WWE Championship in a Punjabi Prison Match. This actually makes sense from a story perspective. The Punjabi Prison Match was indeed created for Khali. Plus, in the build-up to Battleground, Jinder called Khali his hero. Admittedly, it was a surprise to see the big guy lumber out there. But it’s difficult to even articulate in English how little I want to see Khali wrestle again. Even WWE themselves have joked about how limited his in-ring skills are. Beyond chopping and bear-hugging, that is.

WWE apparently brought Khali in because of his popularity with the Indian market. They want Jinder to “get the rub” off him, so that WWE Network subscriptions go up in India. Fair enough, I guess. I do like the idea of an Indian faction. Khali could ideally serve the role of a bodyguard for Mahal, with the Singh Brothers finally becoming part of the Smackdown Tag Team Division.

Still, I can’t say Khali’s return gets me any more excited to watch Smackdown. Actually, it’s the opposite. If anything, I might be more inclined to fast-forward through the Jinder Mahal segments. Khalil’s segments were tough to get through before. So putting him with your new heel champion? Not the move I would have made…

Ponderings From Raw:

Kurt Angle announces Brock Lesnar will defend the Universal Championship against Roman Reigns, Samoa Joe, and Braun Strowman in a Fatal Four-Way Match at Summerslam. A brawl ensues between the challengers. This was the right move. Amidst all the buzz out there right now about Brock possibly going back to the UFC next year, having these three in there just ups the speculation about him dropping the belt. As was the case with Wrestlemania XXXI, they can have Brock lose the title without being pinned. Perhaps more importantly, this match has a great “Who’s the man?” vibe to it. Any of the four of them could walk away with the title.

Everybody had great intensity here. Loved Joe interrupting Angle’s exit. Roman has such a great smugness to him. He’d make such a great heel. But admittedly, part of me respects that kind of attitude from a babyface perspective…

Somebody posted a gif on Twitter of Strowman chucking one of those “security guards” out of the ring. Holy crap. The dude flew over the ropes and landed flat on his back. Spot of the night, right there.

Elias Samson def. Finn Balor in a No-Disqualification Match. Bray Wyatt gives the assist, hitting Balor with Sister Abigail. It’s amazing what a little bit of blood can do. I haven’t been to into these Balor/Samson matches. But after the nasty gash that guitar shot left in Balor’s head last week, I was looking forward to this one. It looked like they were really laying it in out there, too.

You know, now that Reigns vs. Lesnar may not be happening at Wrestlemania, I can think of one guy who never lost that Universal Title.

Big Cass def. Enzo Amore. So after the match, Big Show comes out. As he’s about to get in the ring, Cass has Enzo by the head, and is threatening to snap his neck. Well, death threats are one way to get over as a heel…

Nia Jax def. Emma. Emma has essentially been a jobber since she’d come back. I’d love to know how much of that has to do with the Emmalina persona not working out.

Nia Jax gets a lot of crap from “smart fans.” But that rolling Senton was awesome.

Akira Tozawa calls out Ariya Daivari, but gets Neville instead. Daivari lays out both. I was shocked as hell to see Daivari not only beat up Tozawa, but Neville as well. When Daivari first started showing up on Raw, it didn’t seem like he could get a win to save his life. Now this is happening. Pretty cool. But as long as Neville is in the Cruiserweight Division, he’s the top heel. Bar none. I shudder to think what it would look like without him.

Bayley def. Sasha Banks to earn a title match against Alexa Bliss at Summerslam.  In a backstage interview earlier in the night, Alexa called Sasha and Bayley “Team Gag Reflex.” That’s a good line. And when it comes to some of their promos, an accurate one.

But Sasha and Bayley got to the dance because of what they bring between the ropes, often against one another. This was the most prominent Sasha/Bayley match we’ve seen since they came to the main roster, and we got to see some of that magic. Portions of this were really smooth. Great to hear the crowd get into things as they cranked up the intensity in the second half. Really good match.

So now we’ve got another Bayley vs. Alexa Bliss match for Summerslam. Hopefully they resist the temptation to add Sasha to the match, and give us yet another multi-woman match on a pay per view. If Sasha does show up at Summerslam, she needs to accidentally cost Bayley the match. Or perhaps not accidentally?

Jason Jordan def. Curt Hawkins. Very explosive performance from Jordan. Crowd wasn’t buying much of this. But they’re still establishing Jordan as a single. Let’s see what happens when he gets something with some meat to it.

The Revival def. Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson. The Hardys attack Dash and Dawson afterward. Anderson and Gallows cut what seemed to be a babyface promo before this match. I’m game for a face turn. If you’re into wrestling podcasts, you know Luke Gallows is extremely likable. They’ve also got a natural cool factor. Let’s see if they’re still going for cheers next week.

Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose def. The Miz, Curtis Axel, and Bo Dallas. Rollins attempts a show of solidarity with Ambrose after the match. Curtis Axel and Bo Dallas in a Raw main event in 2017. Do you believe in miracles?

They made a point to show Sheamus and Cesaro watching this match backstage. Are we about to see Rollins and Ambrose going for the tag straps?

Great image at the end. Rollins goes for the signature Shield fist bump, but Ambrose leaves him hanging. I’m still digging this. This is the first time I’ve really been into babyface Seth Rollins. While the Shield reunion is clearly being done to benefit Roman, Seth may be the one who benefits the most in the end.

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Kurt Angle’s Big Reveal, Plus Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

Dixie Carter made her WWE TV debut last week…sort of.

Carter was briefly shown on last week’s WWE 24 special about Kurt Angle’s return to the company. She didn’t get tons of screen time. But there she was. They even listed her as “former president, tna wrestling.” This wasn’t exactly Eric Bischoff showing up on Raw. But it was a moment, and about as surreal as it gets in the modern era.

People love to dump on Carter for being naive about the wrestling business. Some would even say downright stupid. But give her credit: She kept TNA afloat for all those years. As such, guys like AJ Styles and Samoa Joe became stars on the national level.

This olive branch extended to Carter by WWE opens a few doors. TNA has undergone two name-changes since her departure in January, and the company is obviously under new management. The Dixie Carter/TNA era is effectively over. If that means WWE is now willing to acknowledge that promotion’s existence, Carter could be a valuable asset to the WWE Network. They obviously don’t have the rights to any footage. But in future documentaries or specials, they can bring her in to add her perspective on the careers of former TNA athletes that have since become WWE stars. Styles and Joe obviously come to mind. But you’ve also got guys like Bobby Roode, Eric Young, and Drew McIntyre. You can even throw the Hardys in there. Especially if they wind up getting the “Broken” IP.

There’s also been speculation about Carter possibly being an on-air character for WWE. That’s more far-fetched, if you ask me. I’ll say it again: Dixie Carter is not Eric Bischoff. When Bischoff showed up on Raw, most of the audience knew who he was. He’d been one of the faces of a nationally televised war for ratings supremacy. Hell, WWE had referenced him on television multiple times. He was ruthless. He was cunning. He was the enemy. That’s why it was so shocking to see him walk out on Raw.

Dixie Carter doesn’t have much of that intrigue. Was she the enemy? Maybe. But was she ever a threat? Not really. Could she get heat? Sure. But probably not enough to justify bringing her in for a recurring role. What’s more, WWE would have to do a lot more explaining to the uninitiated about who this woman is, what TNA was, etc.

Maybe I’m wrong. But I wouldn’t bet on it. I respect Dixie Carter more than a lot of “smart” fans do. But lets not classify her as this major get for WWE. She could do some cool things with them. But most of them involve being interviewed for WWE Network specials. Let’s keep this in perspective, people.

Ponderings From Raw:

Dean Ambrose calls out the Miz and the Miztourage. Seth Rollins apologizes for betraying the Shield. Miz and his henchmen destroy Ambrose and Rollins. I liked this. Rollins apologizes to Ambrose for stabbing him in the back and breaking up the Shield, and then offers him a free shot with the steel chair. It’s probably the most babyface thing Rollins has done since they shoehorned him into that role almost a year ago.

But did you see what they did here? They’re starting already. I talked about this a few months ago. At it’s core, this Shield thing is going to be about getting Roman Reigns cheered. That’s what they were looking for when they brought out Miz, Curtis Axel, and Bo Dallas. They wanted you to chant for Roman to come out and make the save. I’ll give them this, there were “Roman!” chants. They weren’t loud, but they were there.

Bayley def. Alexa Bliss. Seeing these two in the ring brought back bad memories. As such, I pretty much tuned this one out. It doesn’t help that we’ve seen so many combinations of Bayley/Alexa Bliss/Sasha Banks/Nia Jax in the last several months. This division desperately needs some new blood.

Jack Gallagher and Mustafa Ali def. Brian Kendrick and Drew Gulak. I didn’t recognize Drew Gulak. He’s really changed up his look since the last time I saw him. But as I don’t watch 205 Live, that was probably awhile ago…

Enzo Amore cuts a promo on Big Cass. Cass comes out, winds up in a fight with the Big Show. There’s been a lot of buzz lately about Enzo having heat backstage. But the fans are still reacting to him. In the end, that’s what matters.

Wasn’t a fan of Enzo opening this promo with the line about Newton’s third law. Pretty far out of character. A lot of thus stuff sounded out of character, actually. Not what he was saying, but how he was saying it. As opposed to his emotional promo two weeks ago, this sounded much more scripted.

Based on what we saw Show do with Braun Strowman several weeks ago, I’d say Cass is in good hands here. Cass may not have the acting chops quite yet, but they may end up overachieving in the ring.

Finn Balor def. Elias Samson via disqualification. Bray Wyatt appears on the tron, announces he’s coming for Balor. YES! A guitar shot from Samson! A shot which apparently left a nasty gash in Balor’s head. Ouch. I’ve seen a lot of those guitar shots over the years, and it seems like the idea is to hit the top of the head. Samson hit Balor like he was swinging a baseball bat.

It looks like we’re finally getting Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor at Summerslam. Bray has a little bit of momentum after beating Seth Rollins at Great Balls of Fire. But I suspect they built him up to have Finn Balor, as the Demon, slay him. Fair enough, I suppose. At least they waited awhile before bringing the Demon back.

Ariya Daivari def. Akira Tozawa when Titus O’Neil stops the match. Tozawa might not have enjoyed having Titus out there with him. But I sure as hell did. He’s no Bobby Heenan. But he’s a lot of fun.

Kurt Angle announces he fathered an illegitimate child: Jason Jordan. Huh. Vince McMahon’s “illegitimate child” was a pre-established WWE star, and now it turns out Kurt Angle’s is too. What an amazing coincidence that is.

There’ve been rumors abound these last few weeks about this big Kurt Angle revelation being an illegitimate child storyline. One of the obvious candidates for such a role was Chad Gable of American Alpha. Well, they were close…

With Jordan now on Raw and Gable still on Smackdown, this is obviously the end of American Alpha for the time being. That’s a bit sad, as that team never became quite what they could have been on the main roster. But both guys have a lot of potential as singles wrestlers. Jordan isn’t necessarily great from a charisma standpoint. But this is obviously a great opportunity for him. If he can put the pieces together, he could wind up being truly amazing.

The Revival def. The Hardy Boyz. How long do you think it’ll be before they have to turn the Revival babyface? What’s not to like about them? Especially if you’re an older fan.

Matt and Jeff Hardy have now lost to Sheamus and Cesaro, Gallows and Anderson, and the Revival. This losing streak seems tailor made for a descent into that “Broken” madness. The Hardys and Anthem have different stories as far as a deal being reached. So whether it actually happens is still a guessing game. But one can always hope.

Braun Strowman decimates Roman Reigns and Samoa Joe, breaking up their match to determine the top contender for SummerslamNot the best match these two have had. But they got the finish right. I imagine we’re now headed for a Fatal Four-Way Match for the Universal Title at Summerslam. I’m just grateful it’s not another damn Fatal Five-Way…

Samoa Joe is almost 300 lbs. So seeing Strowman pick him up for a Powerslam was damn impressive. Seeing anyone pick this guy up is damn impressive.

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Austin Aries Leaves WWE, Plus Ponderings From Smackdown

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

So Austin Aries is gone from WWE? Well that’s a damn downer.

Depending on who you believe, either the real-life Daniel Solwold Jr. asked for his release, or WWE let him go. Aries; unhappiness with WWE’s decision to not include his Wrestlemania pre-show match with Neville on the DVD release was apparently a source of contention.

Regardless, the separation seems to be amicable. Aries tweeted some things that seemed vaguely happy. But from a fan’s perspective, it’s a shame. Aries is over. He was undoubtedly the top babyface they had on 205 Live. But by that same token, he could have gone so much further than the Cruiserweight Division. Aries has a metric ton of charisma, and could have made that company a lot of money in the right role.

The good news is Aries won’t be wanting for work. Between New Japan, Ring of Honor, the recently re-branded Global Force Wrestling, and the current indy scene, he’s got plenty of options. Ultimately, WWE’s loss is a major gain for somebody else.

It’s just a damn shame they had to lose him.

Ponderings From Smackdown:

AJ Styles opens the show by reinstating the US Championship Open Challenge. John Cena attempts to answer, but Kevin Owens interrupts. Rusev then jumps Cena and a fight ensues. The cool thing about AJ Styles winning the US Title in an untelevised match over the weekend isn’t just the surprise factor. It’s the fact that AJ Styles, a man that many thought would never grace a WWE ring, won a title in what is essentially the promotion’s home arena. Imagine that.

Styles said the United States Championship has been “overlooked way too many times.” I appreciate the sentiment. But it seemingly doesn’t apply anymore, does it? They’ve kept that belt on upper card, main event level guys for quite awhile now. Owens, Cena, Roman Reigns, Chris Jericho, etc. The secondary titles have been in a much deserved renaissance lately, and we’re all reaping the benefits.

Jinder Mahal def. Tye Dillinger. Mahal promises to bring the Punjabi Prison to Smackdown next week. Is WWE management underwhelmed with Dillinger? The crowd obviously likes him, but until recently he’d been off television for awhile. What gives?

I’m still waiting for the Singh Brothers to get in the ring…

JBL mentioned how the Punjabi Prison dwarfs Hell in a Cell. Not sure that’s a good comparison to make. There’s a reason we haven’t seen a lot of these Punjabi Prison Matches, but there’s a Hell in a Cell pay per view.

Xavier Woods def. Jey Uso. Which Uso said the “R-rated” line in the rap battle last week? Let’s just say it was Jey. Because I love the irony of WWE editing that line out of the YouTube clips from the show, but then putting those two in the ring the next week.

A brawl breaks out between Shinsuke Nakamura and Baron Corbin before they can have a match. Cue a match between these two at Battleground. Let’s get this one out of the way so we can hopefully get to Nakamura vs. Cena at Summerslam.

Natalya and Tamina def. Charlotte Flair and Becky Lynch. Battleground Fatal Five-Way Elimination Match to decide challenger for Women’s Title at SummerslamI’m hoping we can soon get back to one-on-one feuds in this division. We’ve seen so many multi-woman matches lately. If I had to guess, I’d say we get Naomi vs. Charlotte at Summerslam.

Zack Ryder and Mojo Rawley appear on the latest edition of “The Fashion Files.” Last week Rawley eliminated Ryder from the big Battle Royal, and they made a point to mention it again this week. The smart bet is a Ryder heel turn is coming. But the guy is so likable. Both are, actually. It’ll be interesting to see if Ryder can garner any real heat after being a sympathetic underdog for so many years.

AJ Styles and John Cena def. Kevin Owens and Rusev. This one didn’t do much for me. The only thing really notable here was the in-ring return of Rusev. He looked fine out there. But man, you talk about drawing the short straw. He comes back, and is immediately put into a Flag Match with John Cena. You can certainly do worse than Cena as far as pay per view opponents go. But they’ll want Cena to have momentum going into Summerslam, so Rusev’s chances of winning are slim to none. Here’s hoping he’ll have a better time once we get through August.

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John Cena’s New Frontiers, Plus WWE Great Balls of Fire Predictions

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

Ugh. Rusev, no. You do not come out and challenge John Cena on the Fourth of July. There’s no way that ends well.

Nevertheless, “Big Match John” is back. And apparently he’s not allowed to wrestle on both Raw and Smackdown because…well, just because. So as far as opponents go, he’s got the pick of the litter. He dropped a bunch of names on Smackdown this week, planting a numerous seeds for potential matches.

It’s unclear just how much time we’ll have with Cena going forward. I mean that both in the short term and the long term. He’s got a TV show, and he’ll likely have various film projects that take him away from the ring. Ergo, the matches he does have will become a bigger deal as time goes on. It’s the Brock Lesnar effect.

So with the roster now wide open, and his matches more important than they’ve ever been, who do they put with John Cena in the months to come? We’ve already seen him go up against so many current stars. AJ Styles, Seth Rollins, Kevin Owens, etc. So who’s a fresh name they can put him with on pay per view?

I’ll give you five of them.

1. Shinsuke Nakamura

We haven’t necessarily seen that first amazing Nakamura match on the main roster yet. But considering the success Cena had with AJ Styles, Cena vs. Nakamura might be it. In establishing Nakamura as a top babyface on Smackdown, pairing him with Cena could go a long way. They made a point to have Cena say his name this week when throwing out potential opponents. So it seems like this one might be in the pipeline. Hell, they could do it as soon as Summerslam if they wanted to.

2. Bobby Roode

They said Cena was a free agent, right? Which means he could potentially go anywhere, right? So why not NXT?

John Cena and Bobby Roode would have a great traditional babyface/heel dynamic that could be really entertaining if done right. It doesn’t have to be for the championship. Hell, it doesn’t even have to be in NXT! They could have Roode’s first exposure to the national audience be in a program with Cena! It worked wonders for Kevin Owens, after all.

3. Samoa Joe

This is something fans have talked about for years. But now that Joe is such a hot commodity, it really needs to happen. Think about it: The Samoan Submission Machine against the man who never gives up. The promos alone could be worth it.

And if you like seeing Cena get hit really hard, chances are you’ll love this one!

4. Finn Balor

When Balor was called up to Raw, they pushed him to the moon. He got a clean win over Roman Reigns on his first night in. That’s a hell of an endorsement, no matter who you are. But since he’s come back from his injury, they’ve taken their time with him. Most likely to see how his body holds up. A great performance against John Cena, and hopefully a win, would propel him right back into the upper echelon on Raw. Plus, they’d have a kick ass match.

5. Roman Reigns

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns could main event a Wrestlemania, and probably will. Sooner rather than later.

Many, myself included, have likened this to a modern day equivalent to Hulk Hogan vs. the Ultimate Warrior. The two men who’ve been positioned as the top stars in the company, going head to head to find out who the top dog is. To a generation of fans, this would be as epic as Hogan vs. Warrior was all those years ago. Though I don’t doubt for a second that a big section of the audience would try to boo this match out of the building. But both Cena and Reigns have a proven track record of delivering in big match situations. And this could very well be the biggest match WWE is capable of putting together right now. It’s practically inevitable.

Now let’s get to Great Balls of Fire

WWE CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE MATCH:
Neville (c) vs. Akira Tozawa

I’ve been waiting on this one for quite awhile. Tozawa was spinning his wheels with Brian Kendrick for way too long. Of course, it’s on the pre-show. Because why wouldn’t it be?

While I’m sure the match will be good, I don’t see Tozawa taking the belt. It occurred to me on Monday that the person who ultimately takes down Neville probably won’t be Tozawa, or Cedric Alexander, or Rich Swann, or anyone like that. It’s going to be Enzo Amore. They won’t put on a mat classic. But it’s a good match personality-wise. We’ve still got at least a few months before we get there, though. So until then, hail to the king!

PREDICTION: Neville

WWE INERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH:
The Miz (c) vs. Dean Ambrose

As hot as the Miz is right now, he desperately needs a new rival. Ambrose does too. This is like the feud that never ends. So let’s put the final nail in this thing. Let Miz keep the belt, then move him into a program with Finn Balor. As for Ambrose…Elias Samson maybe? Seems like the logical choice. Either way, I’ve seen this episode a million times. Let’s just get it overwith.

PREDICTION: The Miz

Seth Rollins vs. Bray Wyatt

If a hero is only as good as the villain he fights, then Seth Rollins is in big trouble. It seems like a long time ago that Bray Wyatt was WWE Champion. Somehow it feels like he has absolutely no credibility left. He’s calling himself a god lately. But as I said earlier in the week, a god would theoretically win a match once in awhile, right?

Meanwhile, Seth Rollins is still doing in babyface purgatory. People like him, and the company is obviously behind him. But his on-screen persona is still missing something. They’ve been trying to make him more relatable by talking about his past transgressions and mistakes. But that’s not cutting it. He’s desperately missing a certain cool factor. A factor that, ironically, 2K Games gave him in their recent commercial for WWE 2K18.

So in effect, this match gives us both a babyface and a heel that aren’t where they should be in the pecking order. So does it really matter who wins if we’re not adequately invested in either guy? In any event, expect Rollins to take it. Because why should Bray gain any real momentum now?

PREDICTION: Seth Rollins

WWE RAW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
Alexa Bliss (c) vs. Sasha Banks

Not quite sure what to expect from this one. Obviously there’s great potential here, both in terms of the in-ring product and the personalities clashing. If WWE would loosen the creative reigns with these two, as they did with Brock and Joe on Monday, the promos could be explosive. I doubt we’ll get that lucky.

I see Alexa cheating to win, leading to a rematch around Summerslam. In theory, they could throw Bayley into the mix. But for the time being, the best option for her may be to remain on the sidelines.

PREDICTION: Alexa Bliss

30-MINUTE IRON MAN MATCH FOR WWE RAW TAG TEAM TITLES:
Sheamus and Cesaro (c) vs. The Hardy Boyz 

You know, if you watch all the different combinations of matches these four men have had since Wrestlemania, you’d probably have a 120-Minute Iron Man Match…

I don’t envy the Hardys, having to get thrown around and beat up by Cesaro and Sheamus for half an hour. Hopefully this is the last we’ll see of this match for awhile. My gut says to go with the champs on this one. The Hardys have done wonders for them. In a perfect world, Matt would snap after losing this match, and revert back to his “Broken” persona. Supposedly, the Hardys are close to getting the rights to that IP. I’ll believe it when I see it.

PREDICTION: Sheamus and Cesaro

Enzo Amore vs. Big Cass

Give Enzo, Cass, and all parties involved credit for making this feel like a big grudge match. I have no idea what kind of match they’ll turn in. But for me, the wrestling aspect is almost irrelevant here. It’s more about the internalization of the characters. Just how ruthless is Cass going to be? What will be going through Enzo’s mind as he tries to fight his former best friend? And from an acting standpoint, can Cass keep up with Enzo? His mic work on Monday left something to be desired…

Whether Cass has got acting chops or not, the outcome of this match has never really been a question. Cass goes over. They’ve got their eye on him for a higher profile role. As for Enzo, he proved on Monday that he deserves a prominent role as well. As I mentioned above, he might want to consider taking a run at the Cruiserweight Title. Though if all else fails, it seems he has a tag team partner in the Big Show.

PREDICTION: Big Cass 

AMBULANCE MATCH:
Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman

Like the Dumpster Match he had with Kalisto, Braun Strowman can lose an Ambulance Match without having to be pinned. That’s definitely advantageous in terms of keeping up his monster vibe. Then again, he’s in the ring with the one guy who’s pinned him before. So maybe it doesn’t matter.

The story they’ve told is that Roman Reigns already has his ticket punched for Summerslam. Win or lose, he’s wrestling for the Universal Title. So it would make sense for Reigns to win here. But they can still play around with things if they’re so inclined. A victory for Strowman could propel him into that spot, giving us the much anticipated Brock Lensar vs. Braun Strowman match. Such a victory could also lead to a multi-man main event with Brock, Roman, and Strowman. Hell, they could even throw Joe in there if they wanted to.

In the end, I imagine WWE will stick to what’s been their prime directive in recent years: Make Roman look strong.

PREDICTION: Roman Reigns

WWE UNIVERSAL TITLE MATCH:
Brock Lesnar vs. Samoa Joe

I’m trying to think of the last time we had a WWE Championship Match that was this highly anticipated or well built. The only one that comes to mind is John Cena vs. CM Punk from Money in the Bank in 2011. I don’t know if this is quite that good. But it’s in that same orbit.

It would be a crying shame to see this match turn into just another visit to Suplex City, i.e. Brock just throwing the guy around a bunch. I want to see a fight. I don’t care if they translate that into a bunch of stiff punches, a submission wrestling clinic, a big brawl, or something else. Give me a competition. Make me believe. Leave me wanting more. That’s what I’m looking for from this match.

The one sad thing about this is that it’s virtually guaranteed that Joe is going to lose. That doesn’t mean he has to come out of it looking like a loser. But it does take a little bit of the edge off. In the end, what’s most important is that WWE takes note of how well Joe has performed in this role. Whether he stays heel, or this program turns him babyface, these past few weeks have essentially been a big coming-out party for Joe. After all these years, he’s finally a bona fide WWE superstar.

PREDICTION: Brock Lesnar

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Samoa Joe’s Boiling Point, Plus Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

Two guys looking for a fight. One guy that’s the best, one guy that wants to be the best. It’s always been as simple as that. So why do they try to make it more complicated? Probably because they have all those damn writers on staff…

Monday’s segment with Brock Lesnar, Samoa Joe, and Paul Heyman was awesome for multiple reasons. First and foremost, it felt real. More so than anything they’ve given us in a long time. Instead of each person taking turns speaking, waiting to say their lines, Brock and Joe were fighting to be heard. Like it was an actual argument. WWE needs to look long and hard at this segment, and then at the heavily scripted in-ring scenes they’ve been  pushing out for so many years. This is what it should be like.

Secondly, it was so damn simple. Brock is the man. Joe wants so badly to be the man that he wants to fight Brock now. There are no tyrannical authority figures involved. No convoluted storylines. Just a raw competitiveness between two alpha males that can only be settled in the ring. I’ll say it again: This is what it should be like.

Thirdly, Joe came off like a ruthless killer here. He may as well be a babyface at this point. He’s brave, confident, and strong enough to take the fight to the company’s biggest and baddest monster. Are his tactics heelish? Absolutely. But his bad ass demeanor and bloodlust are something that coveted male 18-34 demographic can live vicariously through. It’s the same reason so many fans cheer for Braun Strowman. They’re fearless wrecking machines who will stand up to anyone.

WWE loves to talk about putting smiles on peoples faces. This segment damn sure put a smile on mine. For a few precious minutes, WWE wasn’t so sanitized, structured, and rehearsed anymore. A few years ago, Triple H called this the “reality era” of WWE. For once, the product lived up to that moniker.

And I want more. A lot more.

Ponderings From Raw:

Enzo Amore opens the show, cuts a promo on Big Cass. Enzo then jumps Cass backstage. Most of this was really, really good. Enzo looked right into the hard camera, spoke with passion and truth, and the crowd was behind him. I really dug the line about Cass being “nothing more than a seven foot catch phrase. That I wrote.”

They did, however, let him go a little long. Then he apparently forgot something. He dropped the mic, they hit his music, he started to leave…and then he picked the mic back up and started talking again. That was pretty cringeworthy. But to his credit, Enzo didn’t let it phase him. There’s that confidence he talked about. Not sure how much of this was scripted. But if they could produce promos like this more often, Raw would be a much better show week to week.

Enzo seemingly flew into the frame when he jumped Cass. Awesome intensity. It feels like we’ve got a lot of real emotions twisted up in this. As for Cass’ mic work? Pretty wooden. But in his defense, Enzo is a damn tough act to follow. For him, the real test will come after he’s done with Enzo.

Sasha Banks and Bayley def. Alexa Bliss and Nia Jax. WWE is wise to shift focus away from Bayley right now, given how shoddy they’ve booked her lately. It’s damage control. Case in point, Bayley being taken out of this match early. Thus, they’ve upped the emphasis on Sasha. I’ve soured on Sasha’s mic skills quite a bit. But her ring work looks as good as ever. I’m very curious to see what she and Alexa turn in at Great Balls of Fire.

Cedric Alexander def. Noam Dar. Nice win for Cedric. But how long has this story been going? I’m fine with keeping Noam Dar and Alicia Fox together for the time being. But let’s give them somebody else to work against, shall we?

Miz TV addresses last week’s show, tears down Dean Ambrose. Heath Slater demands an Intercontinental Title Match. Before this segment, they hyped up how much “great coverage” they got from that atrocious Ball family segment last week. Mind you, they left out the 15-year-old kid using a racial slur. Hear that? That’s the WWE spin cycle in full effect.

Miz gave us yet another good promo, once again talking about Ambrose’s wasted potential. The “Dean Ambrose can’t handle success” line was interesting. They should follow up on that…

The Miz def. Heath Slater to retain the Intercontinental Championship.  Dean Ambrose was on commentary for this match, and he did the unthinkable. He pointed to the giant pink elephant in the room. While talking about Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel, the “Miztourage,” he says to Michael Cole: “What do they call themselves? The Miztourage? That’s really bad. Miztourage is bad. That’s about as bad as Great Balls of Fire. Who came up with that name?”

I could practically hear Vince McMahon screaming through the headsets.

Emotionally, this was a really good match. As we’ve seen before, Slater makes an amazing sympathetic underdog. I’d love to see him win the Intercontinental Title.  Will it ever happen? Who knows. But this just gives more credence to the fact that Slater can be a singles star.

Did not expect that big Powerslam from the top rope. Slater is never going to be John Cena or Roman Reigns. But he can have that suspenseful, barn burner of a match if they just give him a chance.

Goldust premieres “The Shattered Truth.” R-Truth attacks his former partner. I liked how this was set up. Goldust center stage in the director’s chair. He’s another guy that can go the distance if they keep giving him opportunities like this. I’ve talked at length about that before, but it bears repeating.

Seth Rollins def. Curt Hawkins. Rollins cut a promo after making quick work of Hawkins, and went the after-school special route again. He talked about embracing your transgressions, how they make you who you are, blah blah blah. It’s such a far cry from the cool vibe we got in that WWE 2K commercial. Where the hell is that guy?

Neville def. Mustafa Ali. Awesome Spike DDT by Mustafa Ali in this match. He and Neville told an awesome story out there, showcasing the champion’s mean streak. I feel like I don’t see enough of Ali. If he was featured more prominently, I might actually give a crap about 205 Live.

Bray Wyatt speaks to Seth Rollins from the Arizona desert. Nice to see them step outside the box a little bit. Bray looked good out there. Now if only he had his credibility back. The guy calls himself a god. But hypothetically, don’t gods have to win matches once in awhile?

Finn Balor def. Cesaro. It occurred to me during this match that Balor doesn’t have a match at Great Balls of Fire. He and Elias Samson didn’t even make the pre-show. That’s kind of weird. As much as I enjoy both Miz and Dean Ambrose, I’d rather see Balor wrestle just about anyone than see those two have yet another IC Title Match.

More matches between these two please. Balor’s agility and grace compliment Cesaro’s strength tremendously.

Braun Strowman def. Apollo Crews. Roman Reigns surprises Strowman with a post-match attack, spearing him off the stage. Well how about that. Apollo Crews and Titus O’Neil got to be in a Raw main event. Crews paid a price for it, though. That bump he took on his head was nasty. Makes for a hell of a Twitter gif. But damn.

So…why did Strowman lick Apollo’s head? Crews was decimated by that point, and I get the idea of Strowman being dominant. But why lick his head? Is that going to be a thing?

Apparently Titus isn’t a heel anymore. He stood up to Strowman, and genuinely cared about Apollo’s wellbeing. Makes sense to me. Titus is a hard man to dislike.

Despite what some would have you believe, Roman Reigns delivers in big pay per view matches. Given what he and Braun turned in last time, and the chaotic nature of an Ambulance Match, they could give us something really cool at Great Balls of Fire.

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Punjabi Prison Match Returning, Plus Ponderings From WWE Smackdown

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

I turned Raw off this week at about the 90-minute mark. It was the first time I’d given up on a show since November. Apparently I missed some good stuff afterward, including a follow-up on the split between Enzo and Cass, Samoa Joe choking out Brock Lesnar, and a Gauntlet Match with the women.

What a shame I missed it. But I just couldn’t take it anymore. The show was actively irritating me.

It started when they brought Josh Duhamel out to do commentary during a six-man tag. He was there to promote Transformers: The Last Knight, and an upcoming film he’s working on with WWE Studios. They spent a large portion of the match asking Duhamel questions about the movies before actually bothering to talk about what was happening in the ring. I’ve been watching this stuff for over 20 years, and this kind of thing  is nothing new. But it’s seldom been as grating to me as it was here. It’s like they were trying to mimic a talk show interview.

Later in the show, they did a Miz TV segment with someone named Lamelo Ball and his son LaVar Ball, and then his other son Lonzo Ball. I had no idea who any of these people were. Apparently Lonzo just got drafted by the LA Lakers, so it was partially meant to appeal to the crowd in Los Angeles. But this was just not good. It was an obvious attempt by WWE to get coverage from the major sports outlets so they’d look “legitimate.” Whatever that means…

It was then made worse when 15-year-old Lamelo used the N-word twice. It happened during Dean Ambrose’s entrance, so the music pulled a little bit of focus from it. But it happened. Some of the blame goes on Lamelo for that. But he’s just a kid. What the hell was he doing with a live mic?

And frankly, as a wrestling fan, there’s a larger issue at play for me here. The Ball family shouldn’t have had a featured role on Raw to begin with. I understand WWE wanting to get “the rub” from celebrities. It makes good business sense, and it’s certainly worked in the past. Think of names like Mr. T, Cindi Lauper, Mike Tyson, and Floyd Mayweather.

But WWE has bigger problems right now that can’t be masked by celebrity involvement. They’re the same problems that have been there for years now. Everything is overly sanitized. The wrestlers are too scripted. Certain characters feel hollow. Nothing feels real. The show is too long. The list goes on.

The ratings reflect it, too. Viewership fell below three million people again this week. Pundits talk a lot about WWE’s “base” audience. As in, the people that are going to watch the shows no matter what. Usually, I’m part of that base. But this past week, they chased me off before I could see most of their big angles. If it’s gotten to the point that they’re chasing hardcore loyalists like myself off, how do they expect to bring casual viewers back to the product?

Over seven million people have watched the YouTube video of the first Brock Lesnar/Samoa Joe’s confrontation on Raw. So it’s not like there’s no interest in the WWE brand. I think a lot of the more casual fans are simply waiting for Raw to be good again. Why should they waste their time otherwise?

So what do they have to lose by changing up the presentation and the creative? More importantly, how much do they stand to gain by taking some risks? It’s not like what they’re doing now is setting the world on fire. Anything so we don’t see crap like that Miz TV segment anymore. That thing stunk like balls…

Sorry. I couldn’t resist. Let’s move on to Smackdown.  

Ponderings From Smackdown:

Daniel Bryan opens the show, Carmella vies to get her Money in the Bank briefcase back. James Ellsworth is ejected from the building. I chuckled at Ellsworth’s crack about Bryan not being able to cut it in the ring anymore. Bryan has made no secret about wanting to get back in there. He just can’t get cleared by WWE doctors. The smart bet his inevitable return take place in Ring of Honor or New Japan Pro Wrestling. That’s sad news for WWE buffs. But as much as anyone, Bryan deserves to live life on his own terms.

The Usos def. The Hype Bros. The New Day to challenge for the Smackdown Tag Titles at BattlegroundSurprised the Hype Bros lost this match clean. Maybe that Zack Ryder heel turn is coming sooner than I expected.

So Kofi Kingston insults the Usos, and they just stand there and take it? Yes, they’re heels. But do they have to be wusses too? At least tease some physicality.

Breezango interrogates the Ascension about attacking them at Money in the Bank. Konnor: “The only reason we were at Money in the Bank is because we wanted a match on the card.” Hey, at least he’s honest.

Naomi def. Lana to retain the Smackdown Women’s Title. I was actually rooting for Lana here. How much heat would she get if Rusev came down and cost Naomi the match? Is Lana as good wrestler yet? No. But neither was Stephanie McMahon when she was Women’s Champion. Just do it!

Randy Orton interrupts Aiden English to challenge Jinder Mahal to another WWE Title Match. Shane McMahon grants his request, allowing Mahal to choose the stipulation Mahal chooses a Punjabi Prison Match. How nice that they just happened to have that stock footage of the Punjabi Prison structure standing by. That’s the kind of thing that just shatters your suspension of disbelief.

Jinder name-dropped the Great Khali in this segment. Not sure how good an idea that was. Considering the quality of previous Punjabi Prison Matches, do they really want people Googling them with the Great Khali’s name attached? Not exactly a recipe for quality content.

Baron Corbin def. Sami Zayn. They had Sami Zayn interrupt Maria and Mike Kanellis on his way to the ring. Not a bad first opponent for Mike Kanellis. Not a bad first opponent for anybody, really.

Carmella def. Charlotte Flair, Becky Lynch, Natalya, and Tamina Snuka in a Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match to regain the briefcase. Great effort from all the ladies involved here. It seemed like they were trying to slam each other hard to make up for a lack of hitting one another with the ladder.

They did a weird sequence where Charlotte and Tamina (with her Joan Jett look) were holding a closed ladder straight up, and Becky Lynch tried to leap up and climb it. They held it there for several seconds, then let it drop across the ropes as Becky remained perched. A few seconds later, they then attacked her. Very tentative. Again, it hurts your suspension of disbelief. But then again, I’m not the one out there on the ladder…

That chair shot Carmella gave to Becky at the end of the match looked weak as hell. If you’re going to use the damn chair, make it look good! That being said, this was the right finish. Carmella gets heat with how she won at the pay per view, and she keeps it here. Smackdown has its new top heel in the Women’s Division. But lay that damn chair in! Also, don’t let the cameras catch you peeking at the ring when you’re supposed to be down on the outside!

You live and you learn…

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Carmella’s Controversy, Plus Ponderings From WWE Smackdown

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

Sometimes I think the so-called “smart” fans forget what real heat is. Wrestling is designed to make us angry, and play on some of our most basic human instincts. WWE did that with the finish to the first ever Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match on Sunday, and people were mad. The problem is they were mad for the wrong reason.

The finish of the match came when James Ellsworth climbed up the ladder, grabbed the briefcase, and dropped it down to Carmella. So the inaugural Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match was essentially won by a man. I got a little miffed about this initially. I even retweeted a comment or two from fans that were upset. But the more I think about this finish, the more I absolutely love it.

I’m about a pretty progressive guy. I understand what’s gets people upset about a woman needing a man’s help to do something. But let’s lighten up and realize what this is. It’s a story that’s designed to get under people’s skin, and make them want to see Carmella and Ellsworth get their comeuppance. It did what pro wrestling is supposed to do.

Hey, I’m a smart fan too. But let’s not outsmart ourselves by analyzing this stuff to the point that we can’t enjoy it anymore.

Ponderings From Smackdown:

Carmella and James Ellsworth discuss the controversial ending to the Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match. Carmella sounded pretty scripted here. But that’s not exactly uncommon on WWE TV these days. And she had some nice fire. So I was good with this. I’d also forgotten she was picked last in the draft last year. That was a nice touch.

Big E. def. Jimmy Usos. Nice win. Nobody ever talks about Big E. being a former Intercontinental Champion. Probably because it didn’t end up being that memorable. But it merits mentioning when he’s spotlighted by himself like this.

Shinsuke Nakamura def. Dolph Ziggler.  This was fun. A little slow at first, but one of those matches where you find yourself watching for the little details. Nakamura doesn’t necessarily look like somebody who can work the mat, but he and Dolph looked good jockeying for position out there. They gave these guys a lot of time too, which a match like this deserves.

Kevin Owens def. Chad Gable in a US Open Challenge Match. Both Chad Gable and Jason Jordan have been ghosts these last several weeks. So to see Gable get a singles spotlight like this was really cool. Absolutely gorgeous moonsault, and the crowd was into that roll-through German Suplex. I’ve talked before about how Gable could conceivably do well as a cruiserweight on Raw. But I’m scared of what would happen to him, given how stale 205 Live has become.

Daniel Bryan takes the Money in the Bank briefcase from Carmella, announces a rematch for next week. Ahhhhh, so that’s what it was. Do a contested finish, then direct people to a big episode of Smackdown. It’s a smart move. Not just because ratings are down, but because it’s never been done on WWE TV before.

I’m hoping Carmella wins again. Put even more heat on her. On Talking Smack we found out Ellsworth is banned from ringside. But she can still find a way to win. Why not?

I haven’t heard anything about injuries sustained in the Ladder Match, other than Bryan having a throwaway line about Charlotte’s neck. That’s a hell of a bruise Tamina has on her arm. I did, however, notice Tamina’s got a hell of a bruise on her arm. I imagine that was pretty painful. Though not quite as painful as her attempt to diss Charlotte here.

So we’ve got all these women competing in yet another Ladder Match for an on-demand shot at the Women’s Title. Meanwhile, Naomi grants Lana yet another title match for doing nothing other than running her mouth. I’d be more angry at her than Carmella.

WWE Champion Jinder Mahal def. Luke Harper. Baron Corbin teases a Money in the Bank cash-in. Randy Orton brutalizes Mahal the match. Tonight was the first night I really took note of Jinder’s new entrance. It gives him a great superstar vibe. When you see that entrance, it feels like somebody special is walking out. Is Jinder backing that up in the ring? Not necessarily. But his presentation is coming together nicely.

Why aren’t the Singh Brothers wrestling on TV? They’re sort of in the same role that J&J Security was a few years ago. But they’re obviously capable of more. More importantly, Smackdown needs heel tag teams.

So we’re not done with Jinder Mahal and Randy Orton, huh? Damn. I was hoping both these guys were moving on. This likely means Jinder is going to beat Randy Orton at three consecutive pay per views: BacklashMoney in the Bank, and Battleground next month. Not a bad way to get your new champion over. And now that it’s apparent John Cena vs. Roman Reigns isn’t happening at Summerslam, my guess is Jinder’s opponent in August will be “Big Match John” himself.

Maria Kanellis returns to WWE at Money in the Bank, alongside her husband Mike Kanellis. The two appear again in a WWE.com exclusive. I’ve been a Maria Kanellis fan for a long time. So it’s great to see her back. I don’t know much about Mike Bennett, but having him take his wife’s maiden name is a stroke of genius. Again, you appeal to people’s most basic instincts. A lot of men roll their eyes at the notion of a man doing that. Then on top of that you see all of the PDA, and that talk about love. It’s positively nauseating. And that’s why these two could make for a great heel act on Smackdown.

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