Triple H Annihilates Seth Rollins, Plus Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

WWE announced Monday that Jack Swagger has been granted his release. The real-life Jake Hager had apparently been looking to get out for awhile, even bringing it up on Chael Sonnen’s podcast earlier this month.

Hager was signed to a WWE development deal in 2006. So he spent about a decade with WWE. He had a run that a lot of guys would be jealous of. The company clearly saw a lot of potential in him, perhaps as someone in the Kurt Angle mold. They did their best over the years to establish him as a top guy. Had the dice fallen differently, it might have worked. But fate just didn’t seem to be on Hager’s side in that respect.

Hager is a very good wrestler. But when it was time to talk, he was in trouble. He has a little bit of a lisp, and it was noticeable whenever he got on the mic. It undercut the wrestling stud vibe they were going for with him, and it became tough to take him seriously. They had him win Money in the Bank, and later made him World Heavyweight Champion on Smackdown. But it just didn’t click.

They seemingly found an answer in 2013, when Dutch Mantel came in to manage Swagger. As the character Zeb Colter, he essentially became what Paul Heyman is to Brock Lesnar. Dutch cut tremendous promos, weaving in contemporary political elements, most notably immigration. They even got a touch of mainstream buzz over the character. Swagger was put against Alberto Del Rio for the World Heavyweight Title at Wrestlemania XXIX, and seemed primed to win it…

And then he got arrested for DUI and drug possession (marijuana). He and Mantel remained together, but it was essentially over as far as Hager being a top guy.

But Hager’s career doesn’t have to end here. Like Drew Galloway, Cody Rhodes, and so many others who’ve left the WWE umbrella, he can thrive on the independent scene. I also wouldn’t be a bit surprised to see him show up in TNA in a few months, as his old pal Dutch is now back on the creative team there.

Brighter days are ahead for Jake Hager, and I commend him for having the guts to step outside the safety of the WWE bubble.

Ponderings From Raw:

Paul Heyman and Brock Lesnar address Bill Goldberg. Herman’s prediction: “Down goes Goldberg!” That “down goes Goldberg” line is something they’ll be returning to in the weeks to come. It’s something Corey Graves, as the heel announcer, can come back to at the event itself. It’s a great line.

Note that Heyman also put Goldberg over, referring to his latest run as “the greatest championship comeback in sports entertainment history.”

Sasha Banks def. Dana Brooke. After taking abuse from Charlotte post-match, Dana attacks her. Dana has gotten a lot of bad press these past few weeks for her in-ring skills. Looking at this match, I can’t say it’s unfounded. But the real-life Ashley Sebera has only been wrestling since 2014. She’s still trying to learn. But she’s doing it on national television. It takes a lot of guts to put yourself out there like that. Having said that, she could really use another run on NXT. She can re-establish herself there, and come back later for a fresh start. Perhaps that’s where this turn is headed. I doubt it, but one can always hope.

Brian Kendrick and Tony Nese def. Akira Tozawa and TJ Perkins. TJ Perkins had a good match with Shinsuke Nakamura on NXT last week, and he was tremendous in this match. But this guy needs a heel turn. He’s looked like a loser for months, and he’s officially grating. I wouldn’t mind seeing he and Tozawa in a program.

Kevin Owens vows to take Chris Jericho’s US Title at Wrestlemania, and leave nothing left but the “Tears of Jericho.” Owens and Samoa Joe get themselves disqualified in a match with Jericho and Sami Zayn. Another really good promo from Owens. In classic heel fashion he justified his actions, believing himself to be right. He accused Jericho of wanting to get close to him just to get close to the Universal Championship. I love when bad guys do that. No one really believes they’re evil. We all usually believe we’re doing what’s right.

This Owens/Joe team-up did nothing to dispel the rumors of them forming a faction alongside Triple H. I’m not sure you need Triple H on TV every week in a group. But the prospect of Owens and Joe together consistently remains ntriguing.

I wouldn’t have had Owens and Jericho touch here. At the very least, I’d have limited their contact to that super kick Owens gave him. But then again, Owens obviously beat the hell out of him at the now infamous Festival of Friendship. So I guess we’ve been there and done that.

Big Show to compete in Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal. They did a “New Day Talks” segment, which was supposed to be their take on a talk show segment. It ended up with Titus O’Neil being mad at Big Show because he wasn’t in the WWE/Jetsons movie that comes out this week. Wow. What compelling TV…

But what I got out of this segment was the line about Show getting the opportunity to be a two-time winner of the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal. Ouch. I guess that makes it official: Shaq is out of Wrestlemania. That’s a rotten break for Show. He supposedly spent months preparing for that match, getting himself in the best shape of his career, only to be stuck in the Battle Royal again this year.

Cass had some really nice fire in that pre-match promo. He still had some that deer-in-the-headlights look going on. But he made me believe.

Sheamus and Cesaro vs. Enzo and Cass goes to a no-contest after Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson interfere. Not much suspense to this match. Earlier in the show, Anderson and Gallows cut that promo about taking the spotlight for themselves. The finish to this one was pretty obvious at that point.

As if it wasn’t already pretty clear what the match is going to be at Wrestlemania. And of course a short time later it was made official: a Triple-Threat Tag Team Match for the Raw Tag Team Titles.

The Undertaker’s trademark gong goes off during Roman Reigns’ match with Jinder Mahal. Reigns calls the Undertaker out. Shawn Michaels surprises him. Reigns: The Undertaker retired you, and I’m the guy that’s gonna retire him.” Well, they went there. Let the speculation about the Undertaker’s retirement continue. This is already so damn emotional. Damn…this could really be it…

If this does turn out to be Undertaker’s retirement match, how fitting is it that it’s Shawn Michaels who planted that seed in Roman’s mind. Nice continuity there.

Austin Aries def. Ariya Daivari. Austin Aries wrestling on Raw. By God, what a time to be alive.

Bayley def. Nia Jax via DQ. Couldn’t muster up much enthusiasm for this one. We’ve seen this one so much. I dig the larger story they’re telling here, though. The idea is that Bayley can’t win big matches without Sasha’s help, so all these women are worthy of title shots. I expect Nia to be added to Wrestlemania in short order.

Mick Foley refuses to fire someone by order of Stephanie McMahon. Triple H comes out to belittle him. Seth Rollins makes the save, but the Game destroys the would-be “King Slayer.” I loved this segment. I really did. Everybody was perfectly in character, and it made perfect sense. This was great drama.

Seeing Mick and Triple H in the ring together was a nice nostalgia trip. They’ve always had a great lovable hero meets cunning villain chemistry. Foley was good on the mic here, too. He stumbled a bit, but he was in the zone. He hasn’t had an easy time in this role. But I was proud of him tonight.

Didn’t expect Rollins to be on the losing end of that confrontation with Hunter. But it makes sense when you stop to think about it. Seth’s knee has a big question mark over it. So now we’re left guessing.

Those CM Punk chants aren’t going away, are they? They’re following Steph, in particular. Considering the adverse effect that character has had on this show in recent years, I’m not complaining. I’m a Punk fan, after all.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter @PrimaryIgnition, or at Facebook.com/PrimaryIgnition.

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The Undertaker Returns, and Other Ponderings From WWE Raw

Bayley, WWE Fastlane 2017By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

WWE Fastlane wasn’t a great show. But it gave us a couple of surprises, both positive and negative.

The biggest one, for my money, was Bayley retaining the Raw Women’s Title and ending Charlotte’s pay per view undefeated streak. I’ve said before that I wouldn’t have given the belt to Bayley when they did. But as that die had already been cast, I think they made the right move here.  After all he back and forth switches they did with Charlotte and Sasha, it seemed pretty obvious history was going to repeat itself. But they defied expectations, and added even more fuel for what seems like the inevitable Sasha Banks heel turn. Now you can once again call one of Bayley’s wins over Charlotte into question because of Sasha. What’s more, Bayley has done what Sasha could never do: Beat Charlotte on pay per view. This has turned out to be some really good storytelling. Bravo, WWE.

Less pleasant a surprise was the decision to have Roman Reigns beat Braun Strowman clean. Granted, it was the “chosen one” who beat him, and they did put on a really good match. But this all felt very anticlimactic. The establishment of Strowman as this unstoppable monster has become one of the better parts of Raw. I understand keeping Roman strong for Wrestlemania. But at the expense of Strowman? It seems like a waste. Mind you, Strowman won’t be killed by one loss. But this was needless. The big man could have gone undefeated for several more months.

Goldberg, WWE Fastlane 2017Then there’s Goldberg. The 50-year-old former WCW star won his first Heavyweight Title in over a decade, beating Kevin Owens in about two minutes. It was fine for what it was. We knew these two weren’t having a long match. Loved Owens “taking a powder” before the bell even rang. He milked it wonderfully. And how ironic is it that Goldberg’s old rival Chris Jericho is the one to come out, cause the distraction, and allow him to score the pin.

I saw many a fan on Twitter whining about Kevin Owens having to drop the belt. To that I say boo hoo. He lost the belt to one of the biggest stars the business has ever seen. If a squash like that is good enough for Brock Lesnar, it’s good enough for Kevin Owens. The guy will be fine, kids. Calm down.

Ponderings From Raw:

Chris Jericho calls out Kevin Owens. US Title Match between the two announced for Wrestlemania. Owens and Samoa Joe attack Jericho. Sami Zayn makes the save. Owens beat Zayn in an impromptu match. This Owens/Jericho match fell nicely into place, didn’t it? No wasted time here.

This seems to be the start of an alliance between Kevin Owens and Samoa Joe, with Triple H being the common factor. They’d make an interesting tag team for sure.

Also, remember what Owens said about getting a rematch whenever he wants one. That’s a good continuity note for the future…

Neville def. Rich Swann to retain the WWE Cruiserweight Title. Austin Aries decks Neville after the champion disrespects him. Gorgeous attempt at a Phoenix Splash by Rich Swann. One of the best athletes on the entire roster.

Neville vs. Austin Aries. Now there’s a Wrestlemania match. I wouldn’t rule out a multi-man title match though. We all know how they love to shove everybody on the Wrestlemania card.

Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman interrupt Goldberg’s return to Raw as champion. Lesnar hits an F5 on Goldberg. I don’t have as much of an issue with those CM Punk chants as some people do. Especially in Chicago. But at certain points it’s cringeworthy. As much as I love Punk, had I been at this show I would not have been chanting his name at Goldberg. Not the time for that.

It’s not everybody’s cup of tea, but Lesnar vs. Goldberg feels like a solid Wrestlemania main event to me. They’ve told a good story. Now it’s just a matter of how Goldberg will do in a match that’s longer than a minute…

Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson def. Enzo and Cass via disqualification in a WWE Raw Tag Team Title Match when Sheamus and Cesaro interfere. Looks like we’ve got a Triple-Threat Tag Team Match coming our way. Not necessarily the recipe for a classic. But we got a pretty good one between Kurt Angle and Chris Benoit, Edge and Rey Mysterio, and Los Guerreros all those years ago.

Ravishing Rick Rude announced for WWE Hall of Fame Class of 2017. Ricky Steamboat to induct. This one is long overdue. The real-life Richard Rood was a big star in both the WWF and WCW. Rude is probably most widely remembered for the program he worked with Jake Roberts in the late ’80s, making public advances toward Jake’s then-wife. But he also got some great matches out of the Ultimate Warrior, and was the centerpiece of Paul Heyman’s Dangerous Alliance in WCW. Fans have been calling for this for years, and I don’t doubt it’ll make for a wonderful moment in Orlando.

Akira Tozawa def. Ariya Daivari. After what happened with Neville, they wisely kept Austin Aries off commentary for this match. But they also left Byron Saxton off. So for one segment we just had Cole and Graves. A pleasant return to the two-man announce booth, of only for a short time.

The New Day def. the Shining Stars. The New Day are still doing the ice cream thing. That was enough to get me to hit the fast-forward button. Thank God, otherwise I’d have seen the Shining Stars. *shudders*

Sasha Banks def. Bayley to make it a Triple-Threat Match for the Raw Women’s Title at Wrestlemania, also involving Charlotte. Slightly disappointed that we may be getting another three-way this year. It feels like they’ve simply tagged Bayley in for Becky Lynch. What’s more, Bayley and Sasha have such great chemistry in the ring, as we saw here. But it is what it is. What’s more, it’s certainly not too late for Nia Jax to be added, making it a four-way.

Triple H once again threatens to end Seth Rollins’ WWE career if he shows up at Wrestlemaniastill can’t get over how awesome Hunter’s return promo was a few weeks ago. It’s was the best he’s done in years. I think we took his mic work for granted when he was out there with guys like the Rock and Steve Austin, because they had such big personalities. But he was great then, and he’s great now.

A vignette airs for he return of Emma. See you in 17 weeks!

Samoa Joe def. Chris Jericho via count-out. How many years has this one been in the making? Hardly the ending I imagined, but I doubt this is the last time we’ll see these two in the ring together.

Braun Strowman calls out Roman Reigns, gets the Undertaker instead. Reigns comes out to face the Dead Man and gets a Chokeslam. Not a good couple of days for Strowman. First he loses his first match to Reigns. Then he flat out backs down from the Undertaker. Yuck.

As the Chicago crowd reminded us, putting Roman in there with the Undertaker is no way to get him cheered. But let’s not kid ourselves: It’s a good story. The old guard vs. the new guard. It also doesn’t hurt that Reigns has superficial similarities to a young Undertaker. The long hair, the goatee, the tattoos, etc. I have no idea what we’ll get once the bell rings. But the build-up should be really, really good.

Follow Primary Ignition on Twitter @PrimaryIgnition, or at Facebook.com/PrimaryIgnition.

WWE Royal Rumble 2017 Predictions, Plus Ponderings From Raw

seth-rollins-wwe-raw-january-23-2017By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

As Raw has been…less than thrilling lately, I’ve opted to emphasize on Royal Rumble predictions this week, and scale back on Raw coverage. Looking at the results, I didn’t miss much anyway.

Our most notable news item is that Seth Rollins is no longer in the Royal Rumble Match, having lost it to Sami Zayn. Triple H’s music played, and he got beat off the distraction. I assume he’ll find his way back into the Rumble somehow, most likely by beating somebody up and taking their spot. Other than some small updates to the Royal Rumble card, that’s about it.

It looks like they’re doing an extra-long pre-show, with Raw putting in two matches. I imagine Smackdown will put in at least one. For my purposes, I’m sticking to the stuff that’s been announced for the main show.

So let’s dive in!

Rich Swann vs. Neville, WWE Royal Rumble 2017WWE CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE MATCH:
Rich Swann (c) vs. Neville

On paper, this is the strongest pay per view match we’ve seen from the Cruiserweights, as it features the two strongest personalities in the division. Neville’s heel turn has been a very pleasant surprise. So pleasant in fact, that I think he needs to take the belt here. Outside of Neville, the Cruiserweight Division doesn’t have any really strong heels. So if you make him the centerpiece to the division, you can put him with the various babyfaces like Swann, Cedric Alexander, TJ Perkins, and Jack Gallagher. All the while, they can keep building their other heels. To me, it makes all the sense in the world.

PREDICTION: Neville

WWE Royal Rumble 2017, Charlotte Flair, BayleyWWE RAW WOMEN’S TITLE MATCH:
Charlotte Flair (c) vs. Bayley

As much as I liked the Raw segment with all of Bayley’s poems, this program is sort of…meh. When Bayley wins her first championship on the main roster, it needs to be a big moment. We’re not primed for a big moment yet. So Charlotte needs to win here.

If they want to keep this going until Wrestlemania, which they very well could, I want to hear more about the differences between these two. The genetically superior athlete vs the die-hard fan from San Jose. I liked Charlotte’s line last week about when Bayley was being a fangirl, she was winning state volleyball championships, or something like that. More of that, please. As Bayley has already pinned Charlotte a few times, we can’t make this that much of an underdog story. But we can make it a good childhood dream story. I’d certainly rather see this match in Orlando than a multi-woman match of some sort.

PREDICTION: Charlotte Flair

Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns, WWE Royal Rumble 2017NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH FOR WWE UNIVERSAL TITLE:
Kevin Owens (c) vs. Roman Reigns
Chris Jericho will be above the ring in a shark cage.

People got pretty excited when Owens won the Universal Title in August. Rightfully so, as he’s a hell of a talent. But the five months Owens has spent with the title haven’t exactly represented a creative high for Raw. The opposite, actually.

It’s not his fault, of course. He’s made the best of his situation, turning his partnership with Chris Jericho into a highlight of Raw each week. But his programs with Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns have been tepid at best, because neither of them are particularly hot as babyfaces. Reigns is loathed by much of the audience, and Rollins was awkwardly turned face after Finn Balor went down with his injury. That damn injury threw a serious monkey wrench into Raw‘s main event scene.

I say we give the belt to Reigns. Like him or not, he’s the man in that company right now. So he may as well have it, especially as we get closer to Wrestlemania. Taking the spotlight off Owens will give him something fresh to do creatively, and it’ll likely give us our long awaited Owens/Jericho feud. Despite losing the belt, this is a good move for Owens.

PREDICTION: Roman Reigns

AJ Styles vs. John Cena, WWE Royal Rumble 2017WWE HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE MATCH:
AJ Styles (c) vs. John Cena

This one can go either way, as you’ve got the Elimination Chamber Match next month. If they want to put the belt on Cena, they can do it here or they can wait a month.

I think they’ll probably give it to him here, so he can avenge his loss to Styles at Summerslam. As is the case with Reigns, a lot of people aren’t going to like that. Especially because this win allows Cena to tie Ric Flair’s record of 16 Heavyweight Titles. But let’s be honest: We know he’s going to do it eventually. At least this way he’ll get a hell of a match out of it. And it will be a hell of a match, folks.

Allegedly, the John Cena vs. Undertaker match is now off the books for Wrestlemania. So the direction for both these men heading into that show is largely unknown. But I can’t bring myself to complain much about that. The element of surprise is something the wrestling industry misses badly. All I can say is, they’d better have something good cooked up for these two.

PREDICTION: John Cena

Royal Rumble Match 20172017 ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH:

This match is always best when you don’t have an obvious winner. Not only do we not have one this year, but this is the most stacked Rumble Match we’ve had in quite some time. The Undertaker, Goldberg, and Brock Lesnar by themselves make this a hell of an attraction. Throw in the full-timers like Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, Bray Wyatt, and Randy Orton, and this could be really good.

Want some statistics? As of this writing, the 2017 Royal Rumble Match features four previous Rumble winners. We also have 10 former Heavyweight Champions. Those 10 men have held a combined 45 Heavyweight Championships in WWE and WCW.

So who’s probably not winning? Goldberg and Lesnar jump out immediately, as they’re working each other at Wrestlemania. Chris Jericho is in that same category, as he’ll likely work with Kevin Owens. Bray Wyatt and Randy Orton are likely out of the running as well, as they’re almost certainly working together. Granted, you can put a title in any of those programs. But you don’t need to.

They could easily give this to the Undertaker. But again, does Undertaker need a Royal Rumble win? Not really. He’s the Undertaker. He’s one of the few who could credibly and believably get a title shot simply because of who he is. Though they could go for a feel-good moment anyway.

So who does that leave? Baron Corbin is a dark horse candidate, but I don’t think he’s ready. Ambrose? Probably not. Miz? No. Finn Balor’s name is out there. But I’m not ready to get my hopes up for him. Ditto for Samoa Joe. So who does that leave?

Braun Strowmann, WWE RawHere’s an answer that may divide the fanbase: Braun Strowman.

WWE likes Braun Strowman. They always have. I can see why. He’s big,  he’s credible, and he’s got a very distinct look. He’s like giant monster with a face like a small child. He’s a monster-baby. More importantly, they’ve done a great job with him since the brand split. He’s been destroying everyone. He has yet to be pinned. It took a combined spear from Roman Reigns and Bill Goldberg to take him down.

The downside? He’s green. He made his wrestling debut in late 2014. While he’s been improving as of late, he’s still very much in the learning phase of his career.

But there was once another man who came in with relatively little experience, destroyed everyone, and shot to the top. That man’s name is Bill Goldberg, and he became a bonafide superstar.

Look at the three biggest stars in this match: Goldberg, Lesnar, and Undertaker. They’re all part-timers who will never again be on TV regularly. Strowman, on the other hand, is one of the only full-time Raw guys that isn’t in that tepid category. If they get behind him and protect him, he can really be somebody.

If I knew for sure Finn Balor was going to be in this match, I’d go with him. But without confirmation, I’ve got to go with Strowman. He’s an investment their future. And keep in mind, just because they go with him here, doesn’t mean he has to win the title. There are ways they can get around that…

PREDICTION: Braun Strowman

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The Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho Bromance, and Other Ponderings From WWE Raw

By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

If you’re a WWE buff, it’s been an eventful few days. The biggest story of all was Goldberg’s shocking squash of Brock Lesnar, which I discussed at length yesterday. WWE followed it up a good Raw. Much better than the one I turned off last week…

Ponderings From Raw

Bill Goldberg, WWE Raw, November 21, 2016Goldberg opens the show, announces he’ll be in the 2017 Royal Rumble Match. This isn’t the route I thought they’d take with Goldberg at the Rumble. But just having Goldberg on the show is a hell of a selling point. This is likely an indicator the rematch with Brock will take place at Wrestlemania. That’s not what I was hoping for, but I suppose it’s fine.

I continue to be very pleased with how these crowds have received Goldberg. He’s still a bigger star than almost anyone they have. I suspect one of the reasons he’s such a breath of fresh air is that he’s not handcuffed by the awful dialogue they give to most everyone else. He comes off like a real person. Imagine that.

The New Day def. Cesaro & Sheamus to retain the Raw Tag Team Titles. Nice way to further the story here. The New Day cheat to win, ergo “Shesaro” is in line for another title shot.

Cesaro had a great showing here. Those two awesome catches, and then the extra-long big swing turned into a Sharpshooter. I’ve said it before, and I’ll keep saying it: How he’s not a bigger star is beyond me.

Cedric Alexander, WWE Raw, November 21, 2016Cedric Alexander def. Ariya Daivari. So Ariya Daivari is basically working the same gimmick his brother did. I’m sure that’ll do wonders for him…

For my money, Cedric Alexander remains the stand-out of this new Cruiserweight Division. Hopefully this new 205 Live show will help us get to know him a little bit better. That Lumbar Check is awesome. Great sell by Daivari.

Chris Jericho and Kevin Owens get bromantic on the Highlight Reel. I’m losing track of who the heels and babyfaces are. On paper, Jericho and Owens are the bad guys. But Jericho is hearing mostly cheers these days, and that Toronto crowd did not want to see the so-called “best friends” break up. And when they simultaneously said Roman Reigns was to blame for the Survivor Series loss, the place erupted. These guys are the most consistently entertaining aspect of Raw these days, and it’s becoming harder and harder to boo them.

This was a good segment. Owens and Jericho were having fun out there, and so were the fans. On the other hand, poor Roman can’t catch a break.

Rusev def. Enzo Amore. That naked Enzo pre-tape is another thing I think the Toronto crowd helped. They were so excitable they bought into what might have come off as another bad comedy segment. Not much of a match. But at least Rusev got a win. They’ve got some rebuilding to do with him.

Luke Gallows, R-Truth, WWE Raw, November 21, 2016Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson def. Golden Truth to earn a tag title shot next week. This one was a dud, for my money. It was pretty obvious who the winners would be, so the whole thing dragged. The news peg here is that the New Day will apparently be defending the tag belts often as they get closer to breaking the Demolition record. I think it’s a solid bet that they do it. At the very least, they’re not going to lose the belts to Gallows and Anderson.

Braun Strowman def. Sami Zayn via referee stoppage. Here’s the good news about Braun Strowman: He’s extremely credible, and people are starting to buy into him. The bad news? He may not know his own strength. Everything this guy does looks like it hurts, most likely because it does. Sami certainly earned his underdog reputation here, and he played his part perfectly.

Sasha & Bayley def. Charlotte & Nia Jax. Sasha Banks to challenge for Raw Women’s Title next week. I’ve stopped trying to guess what their plans are with Charlotte and Sasha. I was wrong when Sasha won the belt on Raw the first time, I was wrong at Summerslam, I was wrong at Hell in a Cell. If I made a prediction, I’m sure I’d be wrong anyway.

Nia Jax had a great line to Sasha in this segment: “Listen little girl, you’re gonna learn that when you stand next to me, you are not the boss.” Her delivery was strictly okay, but the dialogue itself worked.

WWE Monday Nighr Raw, November 21, 2016, Nia JaxOn the subject of Nia, I was shocked to see her tap out at Survivor Series. Nice little moment for Becky Lynch, though. She’s the first lady to beat Nia on the main roster.

Rich Swann def. TJ Perkins and Noam Dar to earn a Cruiserweight Title shot on the premiere of 205 LiveNo surprise here. WWE has been grooming Swann for this. I don’t see him winning the belt, but it’s a big match for him. Much respect to these guys for kicking the crap out of each other. Especially that one from Perkins that landed right on Dar’s cheek. Ouch.

Kevin Owens def. Seth Rollins in a no-disqualification match to retain the WWE Universal Title. A really solid main event. You look at a match like this, and you realize what a shame it is they didn’t turn Rollins babyface when he first came back. He performs at such a high level, and he’d be getting such better reactions if they’d just gone for it.

And yes, that appeared to be a Sin Cara mask Jericho was wearing. That’s a nice little wink, isn’t it?

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Goldberg’s Quick Win, and a Few Ponderings from WWE Survivor Series 2016

Goldberg, Brock Lesnar, WWE Survivor Series 2016By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

I’ll say this much: We didn’t see that coming. No sir, not at all.

Goldberg beats Brock Lesnar with a shove, two spears, and a jackhammer. It was reminiscent of a Ronda Rousey fight, in that you could literally show most of the match in an animated GIF on Twitter. Perhaps more importantly, Brock Lesnar was pinned for the first time since Wrestlemania XXIX. He broke the Undertaker’s Wrestlemania streak, he victimized John Cena, he split Randy Orton open, and then he lost to Goldberg in about a minute.

This almost makes sense. Goldberg is about 50 years old, he tweaked his shoulder last Monday on Raw, and he wasn’t exactly known for length Ric Flair-style matches anyway. In a way, they gave us the dominant, take-no-prisoners Goldberg we were all captivated by in the first place. And all that stuff I said about Goldberg coming back just to lose to Brock? Yeah, that’s out the window…

If the idea was to get people talking, mission accomplished. As I type this, fans continue to debate the pros and cons of this move. It was a shocking match that I’m sure people will talk about for years to come.

Paul Heyman, Brock Lesnar, WWE Survivor Series 2016But Brock, man. Reportedly, Brock was all for this, as he and Goldberg are buddies. And I get that this is all part of a larger story. But I can’t help but lament Brock getting pinned. WWE has spent the last two and a half years turning Brock Lesnar into one of the greatest killers they’ve ever produced. You look at all the guys Lesnar has put down, and it seemed obvious that they were saving that first big loss for a newer star. The most obvious name is Roman Reigns. But who knows? It might have been Kevin Owens via dubious heel tactics. Cesaro could have done it, if they ever decided to really get behind him. You’ve also got the man who could very well be their next killer, Braun Strowman. But after all this time…Goldberg? The 50-year-old Bill Goldberg is the one to knock Lesnar off his pedestal?

We learned this morning that WWE has Goldberg signed for the Royal Rumble. Hopefully, that’s where they do the rematch. They need to fill the Alamo Dome, and this rematch can help do it. From there, you have Lesnar win and go on to face whoever his Wrestlemania opponent is. Goldberg, meanwhile, can get one more win against somebody like a Rusev. I assume that’s been the plan all along. And it’s not necessarily a bad plan. You get three big matches out of Goldberg. The first of which is barely a match at all, and it minimizes the risk of injury to a man who hasn’t wrestled in 12 years.

But was it worth it? To not only piss off a lot of fans who watched all that build up and waited to see a fight, but to tarnish what you’ve built with Brock? That’s a big risk. And we won’t know if it paid off for awhile yet. This has implications beyond the Royal Rumble. For all we know, it may effect the remainder of Brock’s run. They may make a lot of cash in the short term. But what a risk…

WWE Survivor Series 2016, Randy Orton, Luke Harper, Bray WyattA Few Ponderings From Survivor SeriesThe 5-on-5 match with the main eventers clearly stole the show. Definitely an unexpected finish at that, with Bray Wyatt and Randy Orton being the survivors. I’d say give Bray a title shot if Smackdown didn’t already have a heel champion.  What’s more, they made solid use of Luke Harper, despite his loss to Kane on the pre-show.

Bray Wyatt has been sitting below the glass ceiling for years now. It’s not necessarily for lack of trying on WWE’s part. He’s been put in big matches with the likes of John Cena, Roman Reigns, and the Undertaker. But they’ve failed to make him feel like a big star for any sustained period of time. Some of that has to do with him losing a lot of his big matches. You can talk about the predetermined nature of pro wrestling all you want. But one of the things that has made Brock Lesnar such a draw for WWE is that he wins. Bill Goldberg became a huge star in the ’90s by winning. The Undertaker became synonymous with Wrestlemania by winning. In contrast, one of the reasons Dolph Ziggler has never broken through to that next level is because he loses. A lot.

Next month, AJ Styles and Dean Ambrose will wrestle for the WWE Championship yet again. As great as those two are together, we’ve seen that match way too much. But with John Cena out right now, they haven’t exactly had a lot of options. It’s to WWE’s advantage to get Bray Wyatt on a role, so he can emerge as a bigger player in the months to come. Perhaps he’ll even be the caliber a star we’ve always known he could be.

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A WWE Survivor Series 2016 Preview – A Battle With No Consequences

Team Raw, WWE Raw, November 14, 2016By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

I’m still a little grumpy at WWE after this week’s Raw. Because all my questions still apply. At Survivor Series, what happens to the winning show? What happens to the losing show?  And why should I care?

Assuming they continue with this brand split stuff, the Raw vs. Smackdown format is a good hook for Survivor Series. But this show needs consequences. If Raw beats Smackdown, do they get to pluck a couple of guys from their roster? Do they get the first pick in the next draft? Do they get exclusive rights to a previously shared show, like Money in the Bank? Do they get a gaudy trophy? What’s at stake? We’ve gotten vague threats from Stephanie McMahon, and even the Undertaker. But nothing specific.

In previous years, this is where they’ve run into problems with the Raw vs. Smackdown stuff. There is no real competition between the two shows. That “ratings war” they occasionally bring up is all pretend. Viewers aren’t going to flock to one show over the other depending on who wins at Survivor Series. This isn’t like the World Series, where teams battle through elimination all year. We need a prize to fight for. Otherwise, what does it even matter?

Let’s get to predictions…

Brian Kendrick, Kalisto, WWE Survivor Series 2016STIPULATION MATCH FOR WWE CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE:
Brian Kendrick (c) vs. Kalisto
If Kalisto wins, the cruiserweight division goes to Smackdown.

One would think the Cruiserweight Division would be better on Smackdown, what with Mauro Ranallo being there to call the action. But Raw needs the cruiserweights to help fill three hours every week. If anything, it should be Kalisto going to Raw. Taking the belt off Kendrick wouldn’t be a big shock. But it seems like it would be a big misstep.

PREDICTION: Brian Kendrick

The Miz, Sami Zayn, WWE Survivor Series 2016WWE INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE MATCH:
The Miz (c) vs. Sami Zayn

Like the cruiserweight situation, moving the Intercontinental Title to Raw would be a big misstep. Unless they somehow move the US Title to Smackdown. But why bother? No need to fix something that isn’t broken.

Having Dolph Ziggler in this match would have made it a more thrilling watch. But it’s still a nice way to break up all the multi-man matches.

PREDICTION: Dolph Ziggler

WWE Survivor Series 2016, Women's MatchSURVIVOR SERIES MATCH:
Charlotte, Sasha Banks, Bayley, Nia Jax, & Alicia Fox
Vs.
Nikki Bella, Becky Lynch, Alexa Bliss, Naomi, & Carmella

Nikki Bella being the captain of the Smackdown team stands out like a sore thumb. Becky Lynch is standing right behind her with the title. It’s just weird.

With Nia Jax on the red team, I’d wager they come out of this with the win. They could always remove Nia via count-out or DQ, but I imagine they’ll do that with Braun Strowman later. My gut says our survivors are Nia and Charlotte. I imagine Charlotte continues her feud with Bayley next month, and we get a little something with Sasha and Nia. Though I maintain some sort of bullying story between Nia and Bayley would be great.

PREDICTION: Team Raw

WWE Survivor Series 2016, Tag Team MatchSURVIVOR SERIES MATCH:
The New DayGallows & Anderson, Enzo & Cass, Cesaro & Sheamus, & the Shining Stars
Vs.
Heath Slater & Rhyno, American Alpha, the Usos, the  Hype Bros, & Breezango. 

Sixteen guys? What a mess…

So if one member of a team gets pinned, both guys are out. Thus, I imagine we’ll see some eliminations rather quickly just to thin out the herd. Breezango and the Shining Stars? Thanks for coming.

With Raw winning the women’s match, Smackdown should take this one to make the next match the tie-breaker. So I’d wager a disagreement between New Day and Sheamus & Cesaro cost Raw the match. As for which Smackdown guys survive, it’s hard to bet against American Alpha. Those guys are a long-term investment that should be protected.

PREDICTION: Team Smackdown

WWE Survivor Series 2016, Main Event MatchSURVIVOR SERIES MATCH:
Kevin Owens, Chris Jericho, Roman Reigns, Seth Rollins, & Braun Strowman
Vs.
AJ Styles, Dean Ambrose, Randy Orton, Bray Wyatt, & Shane McMahon

This should be a good one. There’s been no shortage of build to this match, as a lot of their big-money ball players are in it. It feels like there should be more riding on it. In reality, it’s just another match.

Keep in mind, we’ve got two pay per view main events announced for next month: Owens against Reigns, and Styles against Ambrose. So they’ll want to throw in some friction between those guys. I imagine we’ll also have some kind of Shield moment between Reigns, Ambrose, and Rollins. There also seems to be a little bit of interest in Braun and Bray, so perhaps those two will end up brawling on the outside, and that’s how we get out count-out.

To me, the finish of this match hinges on how WWE has booked Kevin Owens. He’s beatable champion, which makes sense given how he won the belt. AJ Styles, on the other hand, is Mr. Smackdown. A heel champion? Yes. But he’s also the guy who beat John Cena clean at Summerslam. So if you have to beat one of these guys, Kevin Owens is the one to go with.

So keeping in mind that we’ve got Owens vs. Reigns to build to at Roadblock, while also slow burning this Owens/Jericho program, I say something happens between the three of them to cost Team Raw the match. This will then allow heel commissioner Stephanie McMahon to do her heel authority figure shtick and punish everybody.

As for the Smackdown side of things, my guess is Ambrose comes out looking strong. We’ve seen Styles and Ambrose multiple times already, so at the very least they have to make us believe he can beat AJ at TLC next month. Who he goes with at the Rumble in January is a toss up. Randy Orton? Is it too far-fetched to suggest the Undertaker? They’ve got a big dome to fill up, after all.

PREDICTION: Team Smackdown

WWE Survivor Series 2016, Bill Goldberg, Brock LesnarBill Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

The clock will be an interesting factor in this match. Goldberg wasn’t exactly known for giving us lengthy Ric Flair style classics. After all these years away from the ring, it would behoove them to keep that in mind.

I don’t see how Brock doesn’t win this one. He’s still in the position to make WWE a lot of money as the invincible monster that ended the Undertaker’s undefeated streak and victimized John Cena. The reaction to Goldberg has been great (with one exception), but they’re nostalgia pops. Brock is the guy to go with here.

This is why I’m banking on Goldberg coming back one more time at Wrestlemania against somebody like Rusev. They’ve built him up as this heroic family man who’s coming back one more time so his son can see him wrestle, all so he can lose to Brock? I don’t buy it. These next few months are likely Goldberg’s last hurrah, so they need to send him out on a high note. In essence, they need to do the opposite of what they did with Sting.

Just be careful, guys.

PREDICTION: Brock Lesnar

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Goldberg and Lesnar, Human Emotion, and a Few Words on WWE Raw

Bill Goldberg, Brock Lesnar, WWE Raw, November 14, 2016By Rob Siebert
Editor, Fanboy Wonder

Just when I think the autumn slump has been avoided, it rears its ugly head. One thing we all need to remember going forward: The descent is gradual. It doesn’t drop off in one week. It starts in October, and you start to feel it come November.

Monday’s Raw was a bad show. It was filled with multi-man matches with no consequences and awful scripted dialogue. It became frustrating to watch, and I did something I rarely do: I turned off the television.

This isn’t a new phenomenon. WWE has been in this creative funk for years. In the “WWE Universe,” everything is sanitized and politically correct. Instead of seeing interesting people playing characters, we have characters that often don’t even feel like real people. We don’t see anything that looks like a real, genuine human interaction anymore. We have carefully scripted and blocked scenes where characters say contrived, awkward sentences filled with company-approved words and lingo.

Brock Lesnar, WWE Raw, November 14, 2016We all know pro wrestling isn’t real. But you have to at least give us certain things that feel real, so we can suspend our disbelief and be drawn into the story. There so very few things on WWE programming nowadays that feel real, it’s actually pathetic.

Then we have Brock Lesnar, Bill Goldberg, Paul Heyman, and that face off segment from this week’s Raw. Was their dialogue scripted? I’m sure it was, to an extent. But when Goldberg told Heyman he was going to “rip off your damn head and I’m gonna feed it to [Brock],” it was like somebody slapped me in the face and woke me up. Then Heyman said the line about Goldberg’s son calling Brock “daddy.” In spite of what he said, I actually smiled.

Feelings. Actual human emotions. Simple human emotions! Bill Goldberg was mad at Paul Heyman for talking about his family, and he threatened to beat him up. But Heyman kept riling Goldberg up by getting personal. Meanwhile, Goldberg and Lesnar have bad blood, and want to beat the hell out of each other. And the crowd was into it! This was the kind of crowd they wanted in Minneapolis a few weeks ago.

Bill Goldberg, WWE Raw, November 14, 2016Was it real? Of course not. But it was real enough.

Then in the very next segment, we went right back into the WWE bubble. We were talking about one TV show being better than another. It matters because….?

The consequences are….?

Whichever show prevails is going to get…?

And I’m supposed to care because…?

After that Goldberg/Brock segment, I couldn’t bear to go back to what I’d been watching before. This Raw vs. Smackdown stuff is fine in theory. But it brings to light a larger problem with WWE storytelling over the last decade or so. Where’s the humanity? Where’s the life to it all?

More importantly, how do we get it back?

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